The Thing that Once Was Could Still Be
by yanks2478
Summary: Donna has left the White House...will she ever make it back? COMPLETE!
1. Default Chapter

Part One  
  
She sighed as she flipped through the channels on the television in her apartment. He was in town. She knew he was coming...but now he was actually here. They all were.  
  
If she let herself get sentimental, she would have to admit that she missed them. It'd been two years....and now Sam was running for President. He deserved it...he was groomed for it. His stint as a Congressman served him well and now he was the shining star of the Democratic Party. His nomination was blessed by President Bartlet and the entire staff as well as the DNC. He married Mallory just last year at a ceremony in the White House Rose Garden with the entire Presidential Family in attendance. The press ate it up. She was invited but didn't go down. It was too soon, she thought. She wasn't ready to see everyone. She'd sent the happy couple a lovely note and something from their registry. Sam had sent her pictures and CJ had filled her in on all the details later.  
  
When she left DC, there were questions. Everyone was confused by her departure and Josh didn't quite no how to explain it. There was crying...yelling...definitely a lot of yelling, she remembered.  
  
Danny had seen them. They were in Virginia...at a little restaurant dancing. They were happy. Then, Donna looked up and saw Danny and a new reporter at the Post walking through the restaurant. The reporter looked in their direction questionably, as if trying to place them in his mind and Danny met Donna's eye. He shook his head and steered the new guy to a table in the back corner...allowing Donna and Josh an out. They left. They drove to his place in silence and then she grabbed her stuff and left without a word. By the time Josh got the nerve to go over to her place the next morning, she was packed and he was furious. He wanted to say reporters be damned! He didn't care what the media did or said about them. But Donna knew. She knew that Sam was going to run. She knew that Josh was going to be his Chief of Staff. She knew that all of her friends were going to have secure jobs. She knew that a scandal could ruin their plans...Josh's plans. It was a fling, after all. They'd both said so on numerous occasions. So why was he yelling? Why was he accusing her of abandoning him....and their relationship? He was the king of nonchalant...but he was furious that she could leave just like that. She managed to tune him out. She wanted to be her own person. She didn't want to live in his shadow or be the fly in the group's political ointment. She wanted Josh to be happy. Politics made Josh happy.  
  
He'd called her last week. She smiled, remembering the conversation. It was the first time they'd spoken since she left.  
  
"Donnatella Moss," he breathed when she answered the phone.  
  
"Josh," she remembered being taken aback. "I didn't know you had this number."  
  
"I begged CJ for it. Don't be mad at her....I can be quite convincing," he smirked and Donna smiled in spite of herself.  
  
"What can I do for you? I'm a little...busy at the moment...homework and all," she pressed.  
  
"I just...we're coming up there for some rallies and stuff...I just...I mean...I thought that you should....I don't know....come out and see everybody," he hedged.  
  
"Josh...I have work and school...and a dog...I'm a little bit involved here," she sighed. "I don't know if I'll be around all that much."  
  
"Well...I know that CJ and Sam....hell....the First Lady...they'd all love to see you, Donna. I....they....we miss you, ya know?" he tried.  
  
"You guys are using the President's old Headquarters?" she asked already knowing the answer. She'd been down there quite a few times volunteering getting things together with Zoey.  
  
"Yeah....'member where it is?" he smiled, feeling hopeful.  
  
"I think so," she sighed. "Josh...I gotta go, okay? I have class in a few minutes," she lied. She needed to stop talking to him. She was considering going to see them all and that, she knew, was not right for her. She was just starting to be herself. She'd almost separated herself from that girl and that time. Her only real contact to the past was with Zoey. She was up in New Hampshire full time now and since they were both studying Political Science more or less and neither had too many friends, they'd become close. Zoey knew the whole story and had long since stopped pleading with Donna to profess her undying love to Joshua Lyman.  
  
Josh was quiet for like a full minute...which seemed like a lifetime. "Okay...I'll see you soon, Donnatella," he breathed.  
  
Donna was ready to answer but then the line went dead and he was gone.  
  
That was a week ago. She knew that they were in town. Zoey had called her late last night to given her the heads up. Now, she was scared. She wanted to go see everyone. She missed them. Over her years with the Administration, these people had become the most important individuals in her life. Zoey had been wanting to hang out with them while they were in town to be close to Charlie. They'd been emailing back and forth for over a year now and she had high hopes that once her father was out of office they could maybe consider getting back to where they once were. Donna was unsure so Zoey hung back. Instead of opening the HQ that night with her family, she was standing in Donna's living room watching her best friend flip aimlessly though the media coverage of her father and Sam's arrival.  
  
"Get up," Zoey ordered pulling the plug on the television set.  
  
"What the hell,"Donna huffed. "Where am I going, Ms. Bartlet?"  
  
"We're drinking. You could use some alcohol and damn if Charlie don't look good on television...so I could use something too," Zoey said matter-of- factly grabbing Donna's jacket from the closet and petting her dog Sparky as she made her way to the couch to drag Donna up.  
  
"Zoey," Donna tried. "C'mon...I just want to sulk. They'll be gone in a week...then I can go back to the regularly scheduled bar hopping festivities."  
  
"You really want to come...I can feel it," Zoey smirked.  
  
"I really don't....you know that," Donna insisted, even as she stood by Zoey, reaching for her coat.  
  
"You love me," Zoey smiled, as she helped Donna get into her coat.  
  
They left the apartment - Zoey skipping down the hall dragging a sulking Donna behind her.  
  
As they walked down the road to their favorite bar, Donna looked at Zoey seriously. "Did he bring Amy with him?"  
  
"Donna....she works on my mother's staff again," Zoey tried.  
  
"That's not what I asked. Did he come here with her?" Donna pressed.  
  
"She's his girlfriend, Donna," Zoey tried to reason. "Was he supposed to leave her in DC?"  
  
"It's not like I care," Donna tried to brush it off. "I was just curious is all."  
  
"Right....you care not about our dear Joshua," Zoey laughed. "And he feels the same way about you. He was only pressing me about your local gomer tally for casual conversation. If you two morons think that for one moment that I believe any of you I got a sack of magic beans that I can sell you!"  
  
"He asked if I was seeing anybody?" Donna smiled a little.  
  
"Why should you care?" Zoey asked with a grin as they entered the bar.  
  
"I...um...I don't...I just think he's ridiculous is all," Donna tried to say with honest sincerity.  
  
"Yeah...I got first round," Zoey promised as they propped themselves onto bar stools.  
  
"Bartender," Donna called.  
  
"Donna Moss...Zoey Bartlet...how are we doing this evening," asked Toby Ziegler without even turning around in his stool.  
  
Zoey shrieked and threw her arms around him and Donna had to smile. Of course they would run into Toby at alone at a local bar, she thought. Donna smirked as they got there drinks and she turned to him and smiled. "Imagine us seeing you in a place like this," Donna commented before allowing herself to hug him tightly.  
  
Toby was startled by Donna's hug. He hadn't realized how much he'd missed her until he saw her again. Two years was a long time and the West Wing hadn't been quite the same without her and Josh's constant banter. "I've missed you," he whispered in her ear while she was still engulfed in his arms.  
  
Donna teared up and smiled sadly. "Me too, Toby," she replied.  
  
"Of course, I'll deny I said that to anyone else," he laughed as he pulled back and smiled at Donna and then at Zoey. "So....how have you been, Ms. Moss?"  
  
"I've been good, Toby. I'm back at school full time and I have a job...not like a great job or anything...but I waitress at a restaurant down the street and...enough about me," she said when she felt like she was rambling a bit. "How are you? How is everybody? Zoey gives me the general updates," she said smiling at her friend. "And, then there's always the networks and news channels for campaign updates...but...I just want to make sure that everyone is...happy and stuff."  
  
"We're going to spend another eight years in the White House, God help us," Toby sighed happily. "We're happy. Josh is moving up on the totem pole and he's obviously thrilled and Sam...Sam and Mallory are going to be the perfect encore to the President and the First Lady."  
  
Zoey smiled and Donna looked wistful as Toby talked about this and that from DC. He found himself opening up to Donna more so then usual. He proudly showed off pictures of his children and told her how well Andi and the twins were doing.  
  
Donna had to admit that she missed everyone so  
  
much. She soaked up tidbits about everything. From Danny buying CJ a replacement goldfish after Gail's unfortunate passing to Margaret's spilling coffee on the Tony Blair just to get the chance to try to wipe it off.  
  
Donna and Zoey laughed and drank and laughed some more. Then Michael walked in. Michael was a PolySci Professor at her school and she'd had him about a year or so ago. They had met up recently at her work and he'd asked her out. She'd been seeing him on and off for about four months now. He was sweet, charming, attractive, and conservative as hell. She loved the constant debating in their relationship...Josh had given her that. The constant banter was wonderful foreplay and she'd never really mentioned that she used to be involved in the Bartlet Administration, so Michael never took her too seriously. He just thought she was a wide-eyed woman looking to turn her life around. She liked that. No pressure, no questions. Zoey hated him. But then again, she was taking his class at the moment and struggling to maintain a "B" average.  
  
"Professor," Zoey smiled as he approached the bar and Donna turned around.  
  
"Michael," she smiled nervously as he leaned down to kiss her. "How are you?" she asked when he moved to drag a stool behind her.  
  
"Good, babe. Who's your friend?" he asked nodding to Toby who was looking at him with no real expression.  
  
Zoey smiled. "Dad's in town. Toby here works for him. Communications Director. He used to be Sam Seaborn's boss," she giggled. "Ironic, isn't Toby? You used to boss our little Sammy around and now...now you'll be working for him. Him and Josh," she laughed loudly.  
  
"He has to win it first," Michael smirked. "And I've heard that Mr. Seaborn has quite a few skeletons in his closet."  
  
Toby raised an eyebrow at Zoey before turning around to face Michael. "Sam's a good man. He'll do fine." Then he looked at Zoey, "I'll still boss him around. He enjoys it, I believe. I do think I'll have issue with Josh though. He's been cranky for a while now and I am thinking the bigger office and responsibility will only serve to make him piss me off more so then he usually does," he smiled, looking over at Donna.  
  
"Has he been okay?" Donna asked suddenly. "I...I mean I saw him on CSPAN the other day and he looked washed out. Of course he wasn't wearing a good suit for television. Or a good tie for that matter," she remembered. "Toby...couldn't you make sure Margaret or Ginger gives him a once over before he goes in front of a camera again? I am hoping the suit was what was making him look so blah."  
  
"Yeah...I'll see what I can do for ya," Toby winked at her concern as Zoey nudged him.  
  
"So you know these people from....what...Zoey and stuff," Michael asked, clearly confused at Donna's bluntness about someone from the Barlet Administration's clothing.  
  
"She used to work with us," Toby said simply. "Now I must be going," he said to Zoey and Donna. "Josh and Amy will be on like round fifteen and he usually ends up in my room bitching right about now. If I'm not there, Sam and Mal have to deal with him. And I left him with a six-pack in his room so who knows what I am gonna get when I get back," he smirked.  
  
"He shouldn't take aspirin for his headache," Donna found herself saying. "Give him plenty of water and two ibuprophins before he sleeps. Then he'll be fine in the morning."  
  
"Thank you Donna," Toby smiled. "We all are forever indebted to you for that little bit of information. Now...we'll be here a week," he said looking at Donna seriously.  
  
She smiled, "I know."  
  
"So...I'm assuming I'll see you down at Headquarters," he stated more then asked.  
  
"I'll try to make an appearance," she found herself smirking.  
  
"Will wants to see you about training his assistants to deal with his scatterbrain-ness like you used to with our very good friend Mr. Lyman," his face softened as he saw her begin to tear up a bit.  
  
"I'll stop by. I told CJ I would definitely see her when she came to town and I wanted to tell Sam and Mal congratulations in person finally, so now is as good a time as ever, right?" she asked.  
  
"I'll drag her down there with me, Toby. Have no fear," Zoey promised.  
  
"You want come back to the hotel with me, kiddo?" Toby asked Zoey.  
  
"I'd love to," she responded. "Donna?"  
  
Toby smiled at Donna knowing her answer to Zoey's hanging question already and kissed her on the cheek before grabbing Zoey's coat and holding it out to her. "I'll see ya," he said to her as Zoey grabbed her jacket and Toby made his way to the door.  
  
"I'm good here, Zoe," she smiled sadly as she watched Toby disappear onto the street.  
  
"I'll call you in the morning," Zoey promised. "I wonder if Charlie's done work for the night," she called back with glee as she exited the bar.  
  
"What the hell was all that about?" Michael asked confused. "You never told me you actually worked for those people!"  
  
Donna looked questionably up at Michael and couldn't quite forget how Michael said 'for' and Toby said 'with' when talking about her job with the Administration. "It was a lifetime ago," she said casually.  
  
"You now know the errors of your liberal ways," he whispered as he drug her close to him and placed a soft kiss on her head.  
  
She smiled sadly. "I'm not that girl anymore," she whispered before she leaned up and kissed him firmly on the mouth. "It was..." she sighed looking at the confusion in his eyes. "You know what?" she said brightly. I'm drunk enough for the night. What do ya say we go home?"  
  
He followed her out of the bar and drove them to her apartment where they spent the night.  
  
Michael slept soundly, as he usually did. Donna, on the other hand was quite restless. She hated Josh, she decided that night. Despised him. She hated that after two years isolated from him, one word from Toby about him drinking had Donna worried about his hangover and his delicate system. She did have to smile a bit, because she knew that Toby had set her up for that one. She fell for it hook, line and sinker and she didn't really feel too badly about that. Josh used to be very important to her. Used was the operative word in that sentence. She hated that Michael didn't know her. Not the real Donnatella Moss, anyway. She had to laugh at that because he didn't even know that Donnatella was her real name. Only her parents and for some odd reason Josh got away with calling her that. She smiled remember the way her name rolled off his lips. She felt Michael shift beside her and pull her closer and she relaxed in his arms. She was not that girl anymore, she reminded herself. She wasn't sleeping her way through the ranks at the White House anymore, she thought. She shuddered remembering that's the headline that Danny said they'd use if her and Josh's relationship ever came out. She knew he was right. She also knew that the President didn't need another scandal plaguing his Administration. She knew she did the right thing. She loved her new independent life. She just hated knowing what she was missing.  
  
She fell asleep finally in the wee hours of the morning. As the sun was beginning to peak through her blinds, she noticed that Michael was not there. Not a second later, she smelled bacon and eggs in the kitchen and sighed happily. He loved making breakfast for her. Then she heard the door. Then there were hushed voices. Then she panicked.  
  
In the living room....  
  
"Oh...gosh. I'm sorry," the voice stuttered. "I must've gotten the wrong apartment or something," he said glancing down to the note he had in his hand and back up to the number on the door.  
  
"Who are you looking for," Michael asked. "I know most people on this floor."  
  
"Um....Donnatella Moss?" Josh asked questionably and a little sadly as he realized that he did in fact have the correct apartment.  
  
"Donna? Who are you?" Michael asked.  
  
"Who are you?" Josh countered.  
  
"I'm her boyfriend. Michael Winston," Michael said offering his hand.  
  
"Josh Lyman," Josh said in response. "You know what? I shouldn't have come here. I'm just gonna go," he started to turn around when he saw a glimpse of Donna coming out of the bedroom. "Hey," he whispered to her so softly that he wasn't sure it was audible.  
  
"Josh," she smiled at him and leaned her head on the corner of the hallway wall. "Why are you here? And how did you know where here was?"  
  
"I work for the leader of the free world," Josh answered cockily. "We know things."  
  
"And you got Zoey liquored up and pried it out of her," Donna offered.  
  
"There may have been liquor involved," Josh smirked.  
  
"How's your head? Toby said you may have been drinking," Donna tossed out.  
  
"I took the pills...drank the water....and my system's not as delicate as you seem to think," he whined.  
  
"Okay," she said simply and smiled sadly at him as his eyes pierced right through her.  
  
"Um...Donna? Breakfast is going to get cold," Michael offered, attempting to break the silence.  
  
"Yeah," Donna remarked, still looking at Josh standing in her door.  
  
"You know...we have kind of a thing this morning," Josh said standing up straight.  
  
"Yeah...I kinda figured," she smiled. "Go run the country now Joshua," she said nodding to the hallway.  
  
"I'll...see you later?" he threw out. "I mean...I don't really care so much as Sam and Will and CJ and the President and First Lady and Charlie and the girls and all do, you know what I'm saying?"  
  
"You're saying that everyone wants to spend time with me but you and Amy?" she tried to joke.  
  
He smiled at her and shook his head, "You know what I mean."  
  
"I'll see you later," she whispered from the couch, meeting his gaze and smiling at him.  
  
"Nice to meet you...um...Matthew was it?" Josh said as he darted down the hallway of her floor.  
  
"It's Michael, Joshua. And you knew that already," she called after him. "You know things!"  
  
"Who the hell was that?" Michael asked as they sat down for breakfast.  
  
"Deputy Chief of Staff Josh Lyman," she answered between bites. "My former boss."  
  
"You worked for that clown? Thank goodness you made it out of there alive," Michael remarked.  
  
"He's a good guy," Donna insisted. "A little crazy at times, but a really good guy. He'll make a great Chief of Staff," she marveled.  
  
"In fantasyland, little girl. It's high time this country had a morally strong individual in the oval office. And as highly as you regard this Seaborn character...the Seaborn/Bailey ticket is completely wrong for our country. I mean....he slept with a prostitute for goodness sakes," Michael pointed out.  
  
"Her name was Laurie, and she was a call girl," Donna automatically corrected him. "She's a lawyer now, I think."  
  
"Donna...these people...whoever they were to you....they're your past. I'm your future, baby. And I want a future with good things so that we can raise our family in a safe, secure, and morally sound environment," he said earnestly.  
  
"You see us having kids?" Donna asked, confused as to the new direction the conversation was going.  
  
"I love you, Donna," Michael whispered before he kissed her.  
  
She smiled and dutifully kissed him back and sighed. Donnatella sounds so much better with the words I love you, she thought for a moment before she automatically whispered, "I love you, too."  
  
Their declaration was cut short by her ringing cell phone. "Hello?" she asked.  
  
"Donna...It's Zoey," she whispered. "Can I talk to you for a second?"  
  
"Why are we whispering," Donna asked as she whispered into the phone.  
  
"I might have accidentally told Josh where you live," Zoey cringed saying the words outloud. "He was a little out of it last night when we got back to Toby's. In fact, he was wondering the halls singing or something I think. But, we when inside and Toby always has a nicely stocked mini- fridge...and I may have had a little bit too much and I was persuaded to tell Josh where you live. I don't think he's crazy enough to show up unannounced or anything today, though. He left bright and early to go get ready a thing of sorts so...tell me you don't hate me," Zoey demanded when she took a breath.  
  
"He was here. He had to go do the thing so he left. I don't hate you and Michael and I are in the middle of something here," Donna said, as calmly as possible. "He has a meeting in an hour...so come over. We'll talk then. I'll fix you something for the inevitable headache that you now have from hanging out with Toby last night," Donna smiled. "Tell him I'll see him later. Bye, Zoe."  
  
Zoey hung up and looked at Toby. "He already had been there and left. Ya think Amy knows Donna's here," Zoey asked as she laid down on the extra bed.  
  
"Who knows? She's kinda only talking to your mother's staff and Josh at the moment," Toby sighed and slumped in his armchair. "Donna's happy with the Michael fellow?"  
  
"Oh shit. She said Michael was there. Which means he stayed there and that means that Josh met him this morning," Zoey realized.  
  
"Donna's allowed to have a boyfriend," Toby reasoned. "Josh has Amy."  
  
"So? You think that makes sense in the mind of Josh? I think not. You're going to the thing?" she asked glancing at the television to see the time on CNN.  
  
"Yeah...Sam and your father have a rally or something with the unions I believe this morning. They'll be using my work. I like to hover," he smirked as he straightened himself up.  
  
"Thanks for the information...I was just gonna ask what exactly the 'thing' was today," she laughed. "You people and your crazy communications skills."  
  
"It's a gift," Toby smiled. "Now you better get a move on and get out of here before anyone else finds out you're here. Secret service cut you a break and I know Josh and Charlie can keep a secret...but if your mother finds out that I got you drunk and kept you here...I'm a dead man. And I'm needed around here."  
  
"I'll be by the office later today. With Donna," she promised.  
  
"Ya think?" he asked.  
  
"She saw Josh for like a minute. He gets under your skin and you crave more of the Lyman charm. Trust me. I had a crush on him for years," she giggled. "But then, I grew up and got tired of the arrogance," she winked and snuck out the door. 


	2. Chapter 2

Part Two  
  
Zoey managed to duck out of hotel without being seen by anyone important. While she was running down the street she ran into Josh. "So...you couldn't resist going to see her, huh? And you plied me with alcohol to help you," Zoey accused.  
  
He smirked at her a little. "I just wanted to say hi is all," he swore. "No big deal...but I interrupted her breakfast with...Mitchell was it?"  
  
"Michael. Michael Winston actually. He's a professor. He's a Republican. He's in love with Donna," Zoey supplied.  
  
"His name is lame. Those that can't do - teach. She always dates Republicans. She's not actually in love with him, is she?" Josh responded to all of her comments at once.  
  
Zoey smiled at him. "I doubt it," she said. "But...so what if she is? I mean...you're in love with Amy, right?"  
  
"I'm...yeah...I mean...of course. Amy's great. I just want to be sure that Donna is happy, ya know? She didn't look happy. I mean...she doesn't, does she? She looked...sad, maybe," he marveled.  
  
"Maybe she was sad you interrupted her breakfast," Zoey offered.  
  
"Yeah," Josh trailed off listlessly.  
  
"Josh," Zoey called, snapping him out of his daze. "Don't you have to get ready...for the um...the what's it called....the rally?"  
  
"Oh...the thing. The thing's like in a half an hour. I gotta go, Zoe. Come by later. Let me torture you some more," he grinned at her broadly.  
  
She smiled at him and kissed his cheek. "For a grown man...you are so silly sometimes," she laughed as he jogged down the street to grab a car to 'the thing."  
  
By the time Zoey reached Donna's place, her friend was alone. "Yo," she said letting herself in and plopping on the couch.  
  
"Hey," Donna grinned. "Did ya have fun last night?"  
  
"I saw Charlie for like a minute. He said I looked good," she beamed.  
  
"That's cause you did," Donna laughed. "How is Josh doing?"  
  
"You get right to the point, don't you? He's fine. He's good. He misses you like crazy, but he's good," Zoey told her.  
  
"He said that?" Donna asked.  
  
"Right...no...he kinda implied it in the rambling that ensued after he left your place this morning," Zoey laughed. "He hates your boyfriend."  
  
"He always hated my boyfriends," Donna sighed remembering all of his schemes to keep her all to himself.  
  
"He isn't in love with Amy," Zoey told her.  
  
"Why would I care if he was?" Donna asked looking at Zoey closely.  
  
"Because you're in love with him, maybe?" Zoey asked honestly.  
  
"Not so much, no," Donna answered. "A long time ago I might have briefly entertained the possibility of considering liking him. But that was a lifetime ago it seems. I've grown up since then. I don't need Josh anymore."  
  
"So what? Doesn't mean that you don't want him," Zoey pointed out. "But whatever. I've wasted enough of my morning on Joshua. I'm seeing my parents today and you're coming with. Get ready. Wear something nice and comfortable. I want to do some photo ops down at headquarters for Sam's campaign and I don't want to pretend to be working like the last time they wanted pictures," she laughed. "I felt so fake it was pathetic."  
  
"When are they getting back from the thing?" Donna asked curiously as she crossed the room to her bedroom.  
  
"Miss Joshua already?" Zoey mooned.  
  
"I've missed CJ terribly," Donna tossed back.  
  
"And it's a rally...not a thing," Zoey yelled back as Donna shut her bedroom door.  
  
At Headquarters Later that day...  
  
"No I'm sorry Senator they're not back yet. No...no this is Donna Moss Jos...I mean I'm a volunteer for Seaborn for President," Donna corrected herself. Donna was amazed how easily she drifted back into her 'Josh Lyman's Assistant' routine.  
  
Just then the first cars arrived back from 'the thing' and Donna and Zoey smiled and ran to the doors of the campaign office. Zoey ran out front to await her parents arrival while Donna hugged Margaret and Ginger tightly. "I've missed you two," she whispered as they squealed.  
  
"Oh my God...Donna," CJ yelled as she came to the women. "Donna! How are you?"  
  
"CJ! Oh gosh...I've missed you so much," she hugged her tightly and held back tears.  
  
"Sam and Mal are gonna be here soon with the President and the First Lady and Charlie," she promised. "And...Toby and Josh and Will will be here any minute. They're all gonna be so thrilled to see you, sweetie," she gushed as the remaining cars pulled up.  
  
Donna smiled as she was hugged by everyone and she felt like she never left. "Donna," Toby smiled as he passed her on his way inside. "I didn't really expect to see you today."  
  
She smiled. "I had to come and see everybody," she smiled innocently.  
  
Everyone was congregating inside and talking and laughing and Josh looked over at Donna and smiled at her slightly as he rolled his eyes. The rally went well. Everyone was happy. Donna looked at her watch. She'd been there a better part of the day and she had to get ready to be at work soon. She'd politely said her goodbyes and promised the President and First Lady that she would be back to visit before they left town. She yelled goodbye to everyone and winked at Zoey before dashing out the front door.  
  
Once she left the room kinda moved in slow motion. All eyes, it seems, were on Josh. And predictably, he quickly found his way through the crowd to the door. Not everyone noticed. But Amy did.  
  
"J," she yelled as she started for the door after him.  
  
Zoey nudged her mother and Abbey made her way to Amy. "Amy...I was wondering if you could help me and Mallory on a speech for the DOR?"  
  
Amy looked at the door and then smiled at the First Lady, "Of course ma'am. What did you have in mind?"  
  
Toby sighed and Zoey smiled. All was as it should be, they thought.  
  
Donna walked quickly down the street attempting to ignore to annoying footsteps behind her. But eventually, she grew tired of running. So she stopped and waited for him to catch up. "What?" she asked him.  
  
"I just...you shouldn't be walking by yourself, Donna," he tried.  
  
"We're in freaking New Hampshire, Josh! I'm fine. I'm a big girl and I don't need you looking out for me all the damn time," she seethed.  
  
"Can I...I mean...would it be okay if I walked you the rest of the way home?" he asked softly.  
  
He looked like a wounded little puppy when he pouted like that, she thought. She smiled at him a little and resumed a slower pace, allowing him to walk beside her.  
  
"Sam and Mallory look good," Donna said to fill the void.  
  
"Eh...Mal looks bored I think," he smirked. "She never lived politics like Leo."  
  
"But she looks good, I think," Donna insisted. "She's glowing almost, you know?"  
  
"I haven't really notice," Josh admitted. "I'm usually with Sam or Leo or Toby or Amy, I guess."  
  
"How is Amy?" she asked, strictly to be polite.  
  
"Good. She's good. She's happy about you and Maxwell, is it?" he joked.  
  
She punched his arm. "It's Michael, you idiot, and you know it!"  
  
"Donna...are you happy?" he asked suddenly serious.  
  
She smiled. "I'm finally finishing school. I'm on my own. I've got my own job. And I'm in a committed relationship," she told him honestly.  
  
"You're wasting money learning stuff that you already know about. You're away from me...I mean us. You had a job that you left. And you're boyfriend is a Republican," he answered her back with a cocky head shake.  
  
She smiled. "Jealous?" she asked.  
  
"Should I be?" he tossed back.  
  
"Yes," she said confidently. "I'm finally on my own, Josh. It's a beautiful thing."  
  
"You never answered my question," he pointed out as the made it to the steps of her building.  
  
"I have to go to work, Josh. I'll talk to you later," she dismissed him by smiling and running up her steps.  
  
So he did the only thing he could. He sat down and waited for her to come back down.  
  
Donna sat inside and looked down at Josh sitting on the steps. She had gotten changed and pulled back her hair and grabbed a sandwich and he still sat there. She had to be at work in a half hour, so she figured she'd go talk to him for a few minutes. She made him a cup of coffee and walked down her steps. "Here ya go," she smiled and handed him the mug.  
  
"Oh shit," he laughed. "I must really be screwed up if you're resorting to coffee-bringing. You've done it twice in the entire time I've known you. You know that?"  
  
"Once when I thought you were gonna be fired for mouthing off on television. I was sure we were both at outta there. And me just by association," she huffed remembering the day.  
  
"And once before you left," he said quietly. "That's how I knew you weren't coming back. It wasn't that you packed up your stuff. It wasn't that you told Leo and me you had to go. It was the freaking coffee. When I saw that coffee," he started to continue, but he couldn't bring himself to say anything else. Instead he just took a sip.  
  
"Hey...let's not spend time dwelling okay? How's your mother," Donna asked, trying to change the subject.  
  
"In love with her neighbor, Mr. Stansky. I hate that old man," Josh snarled. "He's always going over to her place to help with stuff around the house. Fixing leaks....changing light bulbs...he's a regular Casanova," he laughed.  
  
"Good for your mother," Donna laughed. "I should email her or something," Donna mused.  
  
"She misses you," Josh told her. "She asks about you, ya know? From time to time she just asks how you are. I lie to her. I mean...she knows you left and all. I told her you were going to go finish school. She was so happy for you," he smiled thinking about his mother's sweetness. "So, when she asks, I tell her you send your love and that you miss her and that you're doing very well. It makes her happy to hear that kind of stuff, I guess," Josh mused.  
  
Donna smiled at him. "I'll keep your secret, Joshua," she told him. "I'll say that I lost her email address and that the last time we spoke I pried it out of you. She knows how you like to keep her to yourself."  
  
"Do what you want. I think she's surprised you still bother with me anyway...and she didn't know we'd slept together," he smirked.  
  
"For what it's worth," she said. "You're not that much of a bother," she smiled at him.  
  
"Of course I'm not," Josh laughed. "I'm a joy to be around."  
  
"You really are," Donna laughed. "Amy's a lucky girl. I'm glad you two crazy kids were able to work it all out."  
  
Josh looked at her sadly and shook his head. "Can I walk you to work?"  
  
"It's just down the road," she pointed. She looked up at the sky and noticed that it was starting to snow again and she groaned. "And now it's gonna be dead. Damn snow. Last night was the first time it's let up in days."  
  
"Yeah...we were worried we wouldn't make it in," Josh remarked. "Will your boyfriend be mad if I walked you?"  
  
Donna laughed. "I doubt he'd be upset over a walk," she laughed. "Come up," she nodded to her door. "I wanna grab a hat and put your cup in the sink."  
  
Josh smiled at her and followed her up and dutifully waited while she took care of her stuff and then he escorted her to Maxine's Pub which was four blocks down from her building. "They got anything good here," he asked.  
  
"Sit," she laughed. "There aren't many people here anyway."  
  
"Do I get a menu?" he asked as she brought him a beer and some bread.  
  
"I'm bringing you some soup and then some grilled chicken and vegetables. No menus needed," she smirked.  
  
"How do you know that's what I want?" Josh pushed.  
  
"Of course it's not what you want. But you've been eating God knows what for two whole years. I'd feel better if you'd just eat what I bring you," she told him and disappeared in the kitchen.  
  
She came back out with some clam chowder and he smiled that she remembered his favorite soup.  
  
"Donna," Maxine yelled from behind the counter. "I'm closing. See if your guy wouldn't mind taking off. We'll pick up his bill."  
  
"Actually Max, can he stay? I'll lock up when I'm done," Donna pleaded. "I kinda wanted to ensure that he ate a good meal. He might not have one for a while."  
  
"Yeah...I sent the cook home, so you'll have to do it yourself," Maxine warned. "Lock up when you're done and be careful leaving honey."  
  
"Thanks, Max. I owe ya," Donna smiled as her boss left her and Josh. Alone. Funny, she hadn't thought this food plan entirely through, she mused.  
  
"Should I go?" he asked when he saw Maxine leave.  
  
"Nope. I promised you chicken and beer and vegetables," she laughed and disappeared into the kitchen again.  
  
After a few minutes, he heard her swearing to herself and a little bit of banging.  
  
"Donna?" he asked with a grin. "You okay in there?"  
  
"I'm fine," she huffed as he made his way in laughing at her.  
  
"Yeah...but how's my dinner?" he asked looking at the mess she made.  
  
"I can't turn this damn oven on," she whined. "I thought it was on and then...it wasn't and...and then the stove popped or something and the burner went out..."  
  
"Hey...it's okay. I liked the soup," he offered with a smile. "I wasn't hungry anyway."  
  
"When did you last eat?" she asked.  
  
"Some crackers early this morning, I think," he answered honestly. "Today was busy."  
  
"Uh huh. You need to eat, Joshua. The campaign trail takes a lot out of you. Add that your duties as Deputy Chief of Staff and you've got to be half dead on your feet most of the time," Donna argued with him.  
  
"We have beer, soup and bread," he offered smiling.  
  
"Doesn't your assistant make you eat," Donna asked. "Doesn't Amy?"  
  
"I have a never ending pool of assistants through my office. None of them seem to take to my cutting wit. And Amy...she's busy with the First Lady and stuff....so it's not like I see her all the time or anything," Josh answered her.  
  
"Help me clean up," Donna ordered tossing him a rag.  
  
"I thought you were taking care of me," Josh laughed as he began scraping the raw food out of the pans.  
  
"I am. You're just participating in the project to pamper you," she smirked and began to wash the dishes. She washed. He dried. If she closed her eyes she could almost remember the last time they'd done this in his apartment.  
  
She'd been washing the pans from her burned pork chops and he'd been mocking her awaiting to dry the damned things. He kept encircling her waist with his arms and kissing her neck. He'd gotten suds on his face from her pushing him away. So she decided to spray the bubbles off of him with the hose thingy on the sink and soaked him. He retaliated by dumping the soaking pan of water on her. They were fighting back and forth and they ended up slipping on the floor and making love in a puddle of suds and water. That was a week before she left. The last time she made him dinner.  
  
Josh was just drying the last of the dishes and he was staring out Donna. "Hey," he whispered. "Where'd you go?"  
  
She smiled. "Nowhere. I'm right here. I was just thinking about something. C'mon. I'll get you some more soup."  
  
"And beer," he called as he followed out of the kitchen. "We need the beer."  
  
They ate soup and bread and drank beer for hours while the snow continued to fall. Josh told Donna all of the goings-ons with their friends and enemies on The Hill and his annoying assistants. Donna told him all about school and her job and that she and Zoey were volunteering at the Headquarters often. Josh told her all about Sam and Mal's wedding and Toby's kids. Donna loved hearing about her friends. She laughed and cried and drank along with Josh. She even let him drink more than three beers she was having so much fun.  
  
Then reality hit. The snow was piling up and they needed to go home. "Josh," she began as she watched him lay his head back and close his eyes.  
  
"Donnatella," he answered with a smile.  
  
"It's getting late," she offered lamely.  
  
"You let me get drunk," he told her as he tried to focus on her.  
  
"It appears that I did," she admitted. "I was being nice too you."  
  
"You've always been," he told her honestly.  
  
"You're easy to be nice to, Joshua," she told him earnestly.  
  
"I have to go back to the hotel," Josh said.  
  
"I know. I'll get you there," she promised.  
  
"But...how will you get home?' he asked worried.  
  
"I'll get one of the agents to take me," she told him.  
  
"They don't work for you," Josh laughed at her.  
  
"But you could be persuasive and then they would I am sure," she told him as she took the clip out of her hair and let her blond locks fall loosely around her shoulders.  
  
"Donnatella," Josh began. "I've missed your face."  
  
Her eyes filled up immediately and she laughed to cover it up. "Josh...you're gonna make my makeup smudge," she said wiping her eyes.  
  
"You'd still be beautiful. My beautiful Donnatella," he told her with a drunken grin permanently plastered on his face.  
  
"C'mon," Donna told him. "Toby's gonna think I abducted you," she laughed as she helped him up and out of the Pub.  
  
"Yes ma'am," he agreed as stumbled a bit and then secured himself by linking his arm through her's.  
  
They walked in silence for most of the trek back to Josh's hotel. She felt very at ease with the situation. In fact, she felt normal. She hated that one drunken evening with Josh could send her back to that place. Back to that restaurant two years ago when all was right with the world. She sighed softly and Josh smirked.  
  
"I know the feeling," he murmured.  
  
"The what?" she asked looking over at him.  
  
"I remember what we had all the time," he continued. "When I kick ass on The Hill, you're the first one I want to tell how brilliant I was. I do most of my own research now because all of my assistants are incompetent. And that sucks, cause I'm, ya know, by myself and all. My office is so quiet...all the time. And they bring me coffee," he shook his head.  
  
She laughed, "So they bring you what you want every morning? I'd have thought you'd be thrilled!"  
  
"Not so much, surprisingly no," he remarked, looking right at her. "It just reminds me that you're not around. That sucks. The coffee sucks."  
  
"Josh...I've been gone a while," she sighed leaning into him. "C'mon. You know you wanna drink the coffee. And you have Amy. Make her your victory call. I'm sure she'd be honored. You have to move on now," she insisted.  
  
"Like you?" he asked as the stopped in front of his hotel.  
  
"Josh...I have moved on," she insisted.  
  
"I know. You look...amazing. And you have this whole life going on here. I guess I am just jealous that I am not a part of it anymore. You know...I always loved being a small part of your life," he told her honestly.  
  
"Well," Donna began. "You were mostly my life for a better part of 7 years. The campaign, the first term and half of the second. You were my best friend, Josh."  
  
"I miss you," he whispered as his eyes welled up a bit.  
  
"Me, too," she sniffed.  
  
"Well look who it is! Donna, how the hell have you been?" Amy asked as she bounded out the hotel doors.  
  
Donna smiled and moved away from Josh. "Hi Amy," she said sweetly. "How's it going?"  
  
"Good. I was just getting worried about J, here," she said nudging her boyfriend.  
  
"He's fine. Drunk but fine," Donna smirked, then turned to Josh. "Remember...plenty of water and ibuprofin tonight."  
  
"Thanks, Donna," he smiled at her through glassy eyes.  
  
"Thank you, for tonight, Josh," Donna smiled back at him. "Sleep well."  
  
Amy stared between then and huffed loudly. "Let's go, J. It's cold," she said stalking to hold open the door.  
  
"Sweet dreams, my Donnatella," he whispered before disappearing inside.  
  
"Now, J," Amy huffed as he offered Donna an apologetic smile.  
  
As Donna was turning around to leave, she noticed Zoey and Charlie coming around the corner laughing. "Okay Charlie," Zoey smiled. "I'm gonna go now."  
  
"I'll see you tomorrow?" he asked hopefully.  
  
Zoey smiled and nodded yes.  
  
"Can I get a lift?" Donna asked smiling at Charlie and Zoey.  
  
"Get your ass in here," Zoey ordered.  
  
"Did you and Josh have a nice night?" Charlie asked nonchalantly.  
  
"He's home where he should be now. With Amy. Worry not. He'll be a little tipsy for the rest of the evening, but he'll recover," Donna answered avoiding the question when her phone rang. "Hello?"  
  
"Donna...where have you been? Maxine told me she closed up for the night when I called her and I've been worried sick about you," Michael told her.  
  
She smiled at his concern. "I was just catching up on my past," she told him honestly.  
  
"You okay?" he asked.  
  
"Zoey's bringing me home in a car," Donna told him. "I'm fine."  
  
"I'll see you tomorrow?" he asked.  
  
"Yeah...tomorrow sounds great," she agreed and nodded to Charlie before climbing in the limo with Zoey. "G'night, Michael."  
  
"Bye, babe," he said before hanging up.  
  
"Spill, Donna," Zoey ordered as they pulled away.  
  
"It was nice. I ruined dinner and we got drunk. It was like walking back through time," she sighed. "It was a nice break from my reality," Donna said firmly.  
  
"You still love him," Zoey accused happily.  
  
"He was a big part of my life for a long time," Donna reasoned.  
  
"He still loves you," Zoey confessed. "He's never stopped."  
  
"He loves the idea of me. I take care of him and we think alike. Josh loves himself in me," Donna explained.  
  
"Whatever. Everyone knows that he's in hopeless love with you," Zoey went on. "They wanted him to stay home when they discussed coming here. Amy tried to sabatoge his coming more than once. Toby was worried he'd slump into another depression seeing you happy. But, thank goodness that's not gonna happen."  
  
"Exactly," Donna smiled sadly. "Josh has his own life. He loves Amy and I'm just a friend from the past."  
  
Zoey shook her head no and smiled. "It's quite simple. No Josh-funk cause you're not happy and he knows it," she giggled. "He's very perceptive."  
  
"Shut up," Donna laughed. "I'm doing the Michael thing tomorrow, just FYI."  
  
"Yeah...about that. I kinda promised you'd come with us. They're understaffed and since you're an expert at meet and greets...." Zoey trailed off smiling hopefully.  
  
"Michael's coming with," Donna told her.  
  
"Whatever you want," Zoey agreed. "Now I just want to sleep and dream of Charlie," she giggled.  
  
"You had fun, I take it?" Donna asked knowingly.  
  
"I really still love him," Zoey admitted.  
  
"I know," Donna said sighing.  
  
The next morning...  
  
"Okay Donna. What are we doing today? I'm all yours," Michael said, smiling as he appeared at her door.  
  
"Actually," she hedged as she let him in.  
  
"What now?" he sighed as he sat down on the couch.  
  
She joined him and smiled. "I was thinking we'd volunteer today. You know...with my friends and all."  
  
"You want me to volunteer my time to help the liberals in this country succeed? You've got to be kidding me," he scoffed.  
  
"No," she said calmly. "I want you to come and meet my friends today. My friends who happen to need some help at this afternoon's meet and greet lunch. They needed some help and Zoey volunteered me and I, in turn, volunteered you because I wanted to spend some time with you."  
  
"Honey," he sighed.  
  
She continued, "Michael. I want you to meet my friends. They were my entire world until I moved here. They'll only be here another few days. I just want them to get to know you so that they can see how my life is now."  
  
She was interrupted by the phone. "Hello?" she asked as she grabbed it.  
  
"Donna, it's Abbey Bartlet dear," the First Lady said.  
  
"Ma'am. How are you this morning," Donna asked smiling.  
  
"I am well dear. Zoey told me that you and your gentleman might be coming to help us at the luncheon this afternoon. Is that right?" Abbey asked.  
  
"Yes, ma'am. Michael and I were just discussing that," Donna said looking at Michael.  
  
"Well, Jed and I would like you both to come over to the house and join us all for breakfast. Everyone wants to see you. Mallory actually just asked if you were coming. So...I'll see you both in a little over an hour? We're serving at 10:30," Abbey said hopefully.  
  
"Yes ma'am. Of course we'll be there. Thank you ma'am," Donna said and hung up. Looking at Michael she smiled, "The President and First Lady have invited us to breakfast."  
  
"Breakfast with The President? Are you kidding me?" he asked, almost in jest.  
  
"Breakfast with my friends," Donna insisted.  
  
Michael shook his head and smiled in agreement.  
  
"Thank you," Donna whispered and grabbed her coat. "Come on. It's about an hour's drive to the farmhouse." 


	3. Chapter 3

Part 3  
  
Donna and Michael were greeted at the door of the Bartlet family farm by the First Lady.  
  
"Donna," Abbey smiled and hugged her tightly. "You look lovely, as always, dear."  
  
"Ma'am, as do you," Donna responded back.  
  
"Ma'am, this is Michael Winston," Donna said, presenting Michael Abbey.  
  
"Ma'am," Michael smiled at her and offered her his hand.  
  
"It's a pleasure to see the man who has made our Donna so happy," Abbey said. "Please come in. Sam and Mal are in the den. Jed is upstairs with Leo. Margaret, Bonnie, and Ginger will be up from the headquarters shortly. Um...let me see. Charlie and Zoey are taking a walk; Toby and CJ are working on this afternoon's remarks and Josh and Amy are...who the hell knows where they are. I think they were arguing when I last saw them. So, they're around here somewhere. Oh, and Will had to head back to DC early this morning for some lower level meetings and a little VP press stuff."  
  
"Okay," Donna smiled. "C'mon Michael," Donna led Michael inside.  
  
Mallory came out of the den immediately and hugged Donna tightly. "I've missed you so much," she whispered.  
  
"Me too, Mal. You were a lovely bride; Sam sent me pictures" Donna sighed as Mallory rolled her eyes.  
  
"Mal, this is Michael Winston," Donna said. "Michael, this is Mallory McGarry Seaborn, the next First Lady of The United States," Donna smiled proudly.  
  
Michael snorted a little bit before shaking Mallory's hand. "Pleased to meet you, Ms. Seaborn."  
  
"Donna? Can I steal you for a second?" Mallory asked, hesitantly.  
  
"Yeah. Michael...I'll be right back," Donna told him.  
  
Donna and Mal went into a side room and shut the door. "What's wrong?" Donna asked.  
  
"I'm pregnant," Mallory said bluntly.  
  
"You're what? Really?" Donna squealed. "Congratulations!" Donna whispered as she hugged Mallory tightly.  
  
Mallory smiled through her tears. "Thanks, Donna...really...it's just that...I haven't really told anyone yet."  
  
"Why not?" Donna asked confused.  
  
"Sam knows, of course. I haven't told anyone else though," Mallory sighed and sat down.  
  
Donna joined her in sitting. "How far along are you?"  
  
"Two months," Mallory smiled. "The baby will be due in September. The 27th to be exact. Not exactly a good time for campaigning. And we've only been married a little more than a year. Plus with the pregnancy I won't be able to keep up with Sam's schedule like Leo and Josh want, ya know?"  
  
"So you're worried about the appearance of things?" Donna asked for clarification.  
  
"Yeah...Sam's...he's just not sure of how Josh will react to the whole thing. I think he planned for a baby in the second or third year of the term," Mallory smiled sadly.  
  
"Josh wants to plan everything. Um, so...you want me to...maybe..." Donna threw out.  
  
"Could you maybe...I don't know...tell him about this? I want to tell my Dad and the President and Abbey...but not until Josh has had a chance to figure it all out in his head, ya know? This campaign means the world to him and I don't want to spring anything on him that throws a wrench in things, I guess," Mallory explained. "He's just now getting to his happy place, you know?"  
  
Donna smiled as she saw Sam appear in the doorway. "Donna," he whispered. "Good to see you."  
  
"Sam," she breathed and got up and threw her arms around his neck. "You're gonna be a Daddy," she cooed.  
  
"I know," he teared up as well. "Can you believe it?"  
  
"Yes," she cried. "You'll be such a good Dad."  
  
"The timing could have been better," he reasoned.  
  
"Not at all," Donna rationalized. "A baby in the White House. It'll be amazing. Like Camelot the Second, or something," Donna smirked.  
  
"Yeah...I just want to be sure that Josh is okay with everything, you know? Did Mal ask you to talk to him for us?" Sam asked hopefully.  
  
"Yeah...I'll do it," Donna smirked. "I'll talk to the big baby."  
  
"Who's a big baby?" Josh asked form the doorway, smirking.  
  
"Speak of the devil," Mal laughed. "Hi, Josh," she smiled as she passed him and kissed him on the cheek.  
  
"Josh," Sam nodded. "We were just catching up with Donna. Breakfast is in fifteen minutes you two," he nodded and left Donna standing there staring at Josh.  
  
"Morning," Josh smiled at Donna.  
  
"Hey," Donna smiled at him. "How ya feeling today?"  
  
"Eh...little headache. Nothing too bad," he smirked at her and wiggled his eyebrows cause her to roll her eyes and laugh. "I, uh, I saw Maxwell out in the foyer there," Josh said nodding to the door, as he plopped himself down on the sofa near Donna.  
  
"It's Michael and he was invited to breakfast. He'll he helping us this afternoon as well. I invited him," Donna said.  
  
"Great. A Republican helping us out. Thanks for the sentiment," Josh said with disgust.  
  
"Josh...don't start, okay? I wanted him to get to know you guys. You're my friends," she tried to explain.  
  
"And you left us," Josh reasoned. "So, by all means, let's hang out with your new boyfriend."  
  
"Don't be like that," she sighed and swatted at him as she joined him on the sofa.  
  
"I can't help it," he smiled at her. "I'm stubborn and I am right," he laughed.  
  
Donna laughed and nodded in agreement. "I forgot. You're right. You're always right."  
  
"I am so glad that you finally remembered," he laughed right along with her. "I've missed your laugh, Donnatella," he smiled. "It's nice," he told her seriously.  
  
She smiled sadly at him. "Josh? I have to tell you something," she told him.  
  
"What is it?" he asked her seriously, straightening. "Are you okay?"  
  
She smiled at his concern. "Josh," she started. "I'm fine, okay? It's not a bad thing, Josh."  
  
"Um...okay...so...what?" he asked looking at her.  
  
"Mallory's gonna have a baby on September 27th of this year...or somewhere in that vicinity," she said quickly, her eyes never leaving his gaze.  
  
"It's Sam's baby, right?" he asked seriously.  
  
"Of course it is," she smiled a little bit.  
  
"Ya think they'll let me be an uncle?" he asked with a grin.  
  
"Probably," she reasoned.  
  
"Why are you telling me this and not them" Josh asked suddenly realizing the weirdness of the conversation.  
  
"They were afraid of what you'd say," Donna said simply. "Mal was worried of how her pregnancy would interfere with the campaign season."  
  
"Gosh..ya know? That didn't even cross my mind," Josh said honestly.  
  
Donna smiled. "See? Look at that. You can be a real person sometimes," Donna said through glassy eyes. "You were just happy for them."  
  
"Sam's my best friend and I love Mal like a sister. I can make it all work. We'll have a freaking baby in The White House! How great is that?" he asked.  
  
"I know. It's wonderful," Donna sighed happily.  
  
"Donna...I've put my feelings before politics before," Josh said honestly.  
  
"Josh...just tell them how excited you are to be an Uncle so that Mal can tell Leo," Donna dismissed his last comment. "Now come on. I don't want to miss breakfast."  
  
Josh looked at her and shook his head. "We wouldn't want Mackenzie to miss you too much."  
  
"Josh," she warned. "Please try to be nice," she asked.  
  
"For you, Donnatella. Anything," he whispered as he squeezed her hand.  
  
Donna smiled and looked down at their intertwined hands for a minute. "I've really missed you," she whispered sadly.  
  
"I've missed you, too," Josh murmured.  
  
"J! There you are," Amy yelled. "I've been looking all over for ya. Hey Donna," Amy said blandly. "Anyway. Josh, I saved you a seat at the table."  
  
Josh looked at Donna for a moment. His eyes were sad and his smile didn't quite reach them. "I'll see you later," Donna said. "I have to go find Michael."  
  
Breakfast went relatively well. The President told everyone about the day ahead and had random facts on the interest groups that they would all be meeting later on. After receiving a reassuring nod from Donna, Mallory couldn't wait anymore and announced her pregnancy to the whole group.  
  
Zoey squealed with Margaret, Bonnie and Ginger. CJ called the baby Sparky the Second. Leo cried. Amy said she needed to go see how pregnancy polled with the women's groups. The President and the First Lady hugged Sam and congratulated Leo and Mallory. Charlie shook Sam's hand. Josh met Donna's gaze and smiled happily. Michael looked around and sighed and thought that this was going to be a long day.  
  
"We have a busy day ahead of us," President Barlet told his guests. "I want to thank Donna and her friend Michael for coming down here under direst from my darling daughter Zoey to give us a hand today. Both Sam and I appreciate it greatly. Donna...we're thrilled that you're back with us, even if it is for a short time," he told her lovingly. "We've missed you, my dear."  
  
"Thank you, Sir," Donna answered him demurely.  
  
"Okay," Leo said loudly. "Once we reach the location, Margaret will hand out your assignments. Any questions will go to Bonnie and Ginger. Thanks for your help,"he smiled.  
  
The ride down to the afternoon event seemed to last for hours. Donna and Michael took a car down with Zoey and Charlie. Donna had missed Charlie and from the looks of it, Charlie had missed Zoey. The two sat side by side and Charlie held his arm around Zoey's shoulders while they all talked.  
  
"So, Michael," Charlie began. "I hear your voting for the other guy."  
  
"I am a registered Republican if that's what you mean," Michael told him.  
  
"Huh," Charlie said. "No big deal. I'm sure we'll win without your vote," he smiled.  
  
"I wouldn't be too sure. Sam Seaborn is far too liberal to lead this country. He's even worse than the President," Michael scoffed.  
  
"Hey," Zoey said. "Michael...I thought we talked about you not dissing my Dad."  
  
Donna looked at him and shook her head. "President Bartlet is a good man and he has done great things for our country. Sam is a great guy and he wants to do real good. I have no doubt that he'll be a fantastic leader," Donna gushed.  
  
"Here, here," Zoey and Charlie chorused.  
  
"Maybe once you get to know him," Zoey started to say.  
  
"I don't think so. He'll only be here a few more days and then the liberal circus will move on. I have no desire to understand what makes you people tick," he said looking out the window.  
  
"Us people?" Donna asked, shocked.  
  
"Well, not you, baby," he said quickly, trying to fix his mistake. "I just meant that I am a dedicated Republican and no amount of time spent with any group of people could convince me to vote otherwise....that's all."  
  
Donna smiled at Zoey and Charlie who looked skeptical and she held onto Michael's hand. "I don't want to change your vote. I just want you to get to know my friends," she reiterated with a squeeze.  
  
"So, Donna," Charlie began. "It sucks with you not at work."  
  
Donna laughed, "Why? It has to be quieter."  
  
"You're not loud," Michael said, looking at her strangely.  
  
Zoey and Charlie stifled a laugh. "Not loud?" Charlie asked. "She is a chatterbox, if I do say so," he smirked. "Her and Josh were constantly bantering about the West Wing at all hours of the day. They were the first thing I heard in the morning and the last thing I heard before leaving. It was comforting actually."  
  
"I used to love listening to them babble about stuff that seemed so silly," Zoey recalled. "Hearing the flutter of their voices just meant that things were right, I guess."  
  
"Josh just needed to be corrected most of the time. He could be wrong a lot. I," Donna said smiling "was his voice of reason and truth."  
  
"And his constant source of agony," Charlie laughed.  
  
"It was a give and take type thing," Donna corrected.  
  
"But, honey," Michael said looking at her confused. "You're so quiet."  
  
Zoey laughed, "Remember the time you wanted your money back in a tax refund and Josh tried to tell you why our way was better?"  
  
Charlie laughed. "Josh was so pissed that you took his money from those sandwiches to 'invest' or whatever."  
  
"I know. I was being logical, but I guess, in the long run, he was right. Stealing his money had a certain appeal to it," Donna mused.  
  
"Josh is a royal pain in the ass at times," Zoey smirked.  
  
"But he's a good guy," Donna defended. "Almost sweet sometimes."  
  
"Remember the Alpine Skiing book?" Zoey said smiling knowingly at her friend.  
  
"I really would've preferred the skis," Donna smirked.  
  
"Right," Zoey laughed. "You were giddy when you read the inscription. And to this day, Josh has never told me what it said. And you haven't either, might I add."  
  
"It was one of the first times that I realized just how sweet Josh really was under his hard exterior," Donna smiled remembering it.  
  
"I'll have you know he agonized over what to get you that year," Charlie told Donna. "I was in the stupid ancient bookstore with The President and Josh that day. I think Josh was being punished for something or other and that's why he made the trip," Charlie recalled. "But when he saw that book...his eyes lit up and I knew, that as much as you wanted the skis, you'd be opening the book for Christmas."  
  
"You know...since he's Jewish and all....why don't you make him give you gifts for all the days in Hanukah?" Zoey asked giggling.  
  
"You know? That really does make the most sense," Donna agreed. "Eight gifts are bound to be better than one," Donna reasoned with a grin. "I'll discuss that with him. Maybe I'll be able to get a gift refund or something."  
  
Charlie laughed at the giggling girls and then looked over at Michael, "You okay there, pal?"  
  
"Uh, yeah...I just don't have much to add, I guess," Michael said, feeling out of place. "I'm just realizing that I really don't know Donna all that well, I guess," he said looking at her smiling and laughing with her friends.  
  
"Michael," she said. "You know me just fine. We're just remembering things from a lifetime ago, is all. This is all my past," she said. "You," she punctuated with a kiss, "are my future."  
  
"Well...I'm her future, too," Zoey added. "So, I guess Charlie is in your future if I am, right?"  
  
"Am I in your future, Zoey? Cause sometimes I honestly can't tell," Charlie told her honestly.  
  
Zoey smiled at him. "Of course you are, you goof," she laughed and laid her head on his shoulder.  
  
"Awww," Donna sighed as Zoey kicked her and Charlie laughed.  
  
"We're almost there folks," the driver told them from up front. "Once we stop, you're to go to the staging tent at the back and Margaret will give you your tasks. If you have any questions, speak to Bonnie and Ginger before they head back to Headquarters."  
  
"Great," Charlie smirked. "I am thinking that my job will be to shadow The President. Not too much of a stretch there."  
  
"I am just going to be the dutiful daughter," Zoey commented. "Donna's the only one of us that is going to be doing work. Michael's just going to be more or less hanging out."  
  
"I'm just happy to be asked to help out," Donna beamed. "I've missed campaign stops," she sighed contently.  
  
"I'm glad you decided to come," Charlie told her honestly. "It's not the same without you."  
  
They all sat in silence the rest of the drive and took to the staging area upon arrival. Margaret was smiling at all of them and handed Zoey, Charlie and Donna envelopes. "Read 'em and weep folks. I'll be busy with Leo, so questions are farmed out to my partners in crime back here," she said laughing as she pointed to Bonnie and Ginger. "They'll be here for another hour or so before they head back to the office. "Enjoy," she smiled as she moved on to the next group of people.  
  
Charlie opened his and grinned as he read it. "Charlie Young: Stay close to POTUS. Well," he laughed. "Who didn't see that one coming?"  
  
Zoey smirked as she opened her's. "'Zoey Bartlet: Be the First Daughter.' Sounds mind numbingly easy. And I'll be close to Charlie, too. I love my assignment," she beamed as both her and Charlie watched Donna open her envelope. "What are you doing?" Zoey begged.  
  
Donna stared at the piece of paper in front of her and walked right back to Margaret. "You've got to be kidding me," she said to her friend.  
  
"I'm not the question lady," Margaret told her simply. "It won't be that bad," she told her. "And seriously, who the hell else could we assign it to? Everyone else would run screaming!"  
  
Donna sighed and walked back to her friends questioning looks.  
  
"Well?" Charlie asked.  
  
"'Donna Moss : Assist the DCoS of POTUS.' I can't freaking believe this," she sighed loudly.  
  
"And that's bad because..." Michael started as Donna went to talk to The First Lady.  
  
"Josh," Zoey said simply. "She's assisting Josh today."  
  
"And...he was her boss before. It should be easy to pick up," he remarked, not seeing the bad in the current situation.  
  
"They had a complicated relationship," Charlie offered. "And when Donna left DC, she in a sense left Josh. He'd become way to codependent on her. None of us saw it as a bad thing until she left. Hindsight being 20/20 and all that."  
  
"Josh and Donna...they're just a complicated pair," Zoey said, watching Donna plead with her mother. "Today should be a hoot!"  
  
"Great," Michael said. "Me, Donna and Josh. What fun," he said dryly.  
  
"Ma'am," Donna pleaded. "Is this a joke or something?"  
  
"Quite simply no one else will deal with him. He needs assistants at these functions and by midway through these poor souls are running faster than their legs will carry them," the First Lady told her calmly. "Amy didn't come down here and all of his assistants from DC are from a temp service and they're not sticking those girls up here with no means of getting away from Josh."  
  
Donna looked at The First Lady carefully, trying to see if this was a set- up or not. The excuse was plausible, Donna thought. Even probable. "I'm sorry for complaining, Ma'am. I am here to do whatever you guys need," Donna smiled. "Let me go find Josh."  
  
Donna grabbed Michael and bid Charlie and Zoey a quick goodbye. "C'mon, honey. I have to find him before we get anywhere near the start of this thing," she told him as they jogged around.  
  
"Why's that?" Michael asked confused. "We have like an hour or so before the first people arrive. Charlie gave me an itinerary," he told her proudly.  
  
"Good for you," Donna smirked. "I need to know who's coming and why and what he needs to get from whom. And he has tie issues that I am sure the last two years haven't solved." Just then she noticed Josh fiddling with his paperwork in a cubby hole in the back, tie slung over his shoulder and credentials around his neck. "I'm gonna need credentials. For me and Michael," she smiled at him as she turned him around and began tying his tie around his neck.  
  
"Take mine," he offered. "Bonnie'll give him a pass next time we see her," he smiled. "Everyone knows I'm supposed to be here," he told her still reading his notes over. "Mike, how ya doing?"  
  
"It's...Michael, actually," Michael told him. "And I'm fine."  
  
"Great," he murmured.  
  
"Look up a sec," Donna ordered and he did moving his notes with him. "Okay. You're set. Credentials?" she asked.  
  
He took them off his neck and put them on her neck without a thought, really. "Here's a pad," he told her, handing her a tablet.  
  
"Thanks," she said and grabbed a pen from his inside jacket pocket.  
  
"Beings that I am important or something," Josh laughed. "I have a portable office of sorts back here. We got chairs and stuff. "Let's go back there and go through what we're doing today. I'll actually call Bonnie and have her get...um...your boyfriend here a pass or something," Josh told Donna as she followed him to his office.  
  
Michael trailed behind them, blown away by the ease of their supposed strained relationship. The office was small. There was a desk, three chairs, a cooler and a campaign phone. Josh needed at least two - one for the Administration and another for the election. "Let me get Bonnie back here," Josh said as he stepped outside to grab her on the walkie-talkies.  
  
Donna smiled at Michael. "You doing okay?" she asked seriously.  
  
"Yeah...you're just...I've never seen you so animated," he smiled. "It's great," he told her.  
  
"It's the atmosphere," she said. "I don't know what it is about it...." she trailed as the phone rang on Josh's desk. On instinct she grabbed it, "Josh Lyman. You know what? He just stepped out for a second. Of course I can; lemme grab a pen real quick," she went on. "Uh huh, Senator Griffin from the 6th District. Right. Okay...what was that number again? Great. I'll have him give you a call as soon as he's done. Great," she smiled. "I'm sure Congressman Seaborn would be very pleased to have your support, sir. Very good. Thanks." She looked over her message and hung up and giggled when she noticed Josh staring at her through the door frame fighting his laughter.  
  
"Well Ms. Moss, I believe this is how we first met," he cocked his eyebrow up with a grin.  
  
"I believe so, Mr. Lyman," she laughed back. "State Senator from the 6th District here is looking to give Sam a fundraiser at his house. They've done this sort of thing in the past and it's very well attended. He wants you to call him back when you get a chance," she told him while he looked over the message.  
  
"Thanks, Donna," he smiled as the phone began to ring. He nodded to it, "You gonna get that?"  
  
"Yes, sir," she mock saluted.  
  
"Josh Lyman," she said. "Yes, Congresswoman, he's actually right here," Donna told her.  
  
"Why are you answering his phone again," Congresswoman Wyatt asked laughing. "And if you don't call me Andie I'm gonna sic my twins on you."  
  
"Andie," Donna obliged. "How are you?"  
  
"Answer the question kiddo," Andie ordered.  
  
"I'm helping for the day and apparently no one likes Josh so he's assistantless," Donna whined. "So, here I am."  
  
"Uh huh," Andie sighed. "Liking Josh is never the problem. He's likable...hell he's adorable," Andie laughed. "It's putting up with his moods that so many seem to fail at."  
  
"Failure is not in my vocabulary, Andie," Donna smiled. "And he's not that bad."  
  
"Right. Well...get his ass on the phone. I need to confirm a schedule for him to come down here and listen to some proposed legislation to see what Sammy thinks about it," the Congresswoman ordered.  
  
"Josh," Donna yelled as he appeared in the doorway.  
  
"Congresswoman Wyatt for you," Donna told him.  
  
"Is she gonna kill me if I call her that?" Josh asked grabbing the phone and briefly allowing his fingers to brush against her hand.  
  
"I'm gonna go through the guest list and stuff. We'll do names when you're done, okay?" she asked whispering.  
  
"Congresswoman Wyatt," Josh boomed into the phone as he nodded to Donna. "Hey! You kiss your children with that mouth?" he asked laughing at her response as Donna shook her head and dragged Michael into the hallway.  
  
"Who's he talking to like that?" Michael asked her once they were moving down the hallway at a ridiculously fast pace.  
  
"Congresswoman Andrea Wyatt...Andie...Toby's ex-wife, the mother of his children," Donna explained grabbing the paperwork Bonnie was tossing at her while she moved to see how Toby and CJ were getting along.  
  
"Huh...so his he knocked up his ex-wife and the guy who's running for President slept with a hooker and the President is a liar and his wife faked his medical records. What a great group of people," he mocked.  
  
"Michael," she sighed. "I am busy. I can't defend this stuff to you right now and I don't want to have to defend my choices of friends to you. They're good people; but more importantly they were good to me when I had nothing. They are the best friends I have ever had and I love that about them. So...please...just look at them as my friends for right now. Please," she begged.  
  
"Sorry," he mumbled. "What can I do?" he asked.  
  
"Donna!" Josh was bellowing from his mini-office. "Donna!"  
  
"God," she huffed. "C'mon," she said to Michael, hurrying to the direction of the bellowing.  
  
"Donna," he yelled at again. "Jesus...c'mon, Donna!"  
  
"What the hell is he yelling about?" Michael asked, following Donna down the hall.  
  
"How I've missed that yelling," Toby laughed as Donna and Michael scurried down the hall.  
  
"Joshua! What?" Donna asked.  
  
"I'm ready to go over the thing for later," he said with a grin. "I just wanted to make sure you were ready."  
  
She smiled at him and shook her head. "You're amazing," she told him and shut the door as Michael came in to sit down.  
  
"I, in fact, am amazing," Josh said in his cocky manner. "I have been told that I am amazing many a time, Donna. And by many a woman. In fact...I believe that one or two times I may have heard how amazing I was from...gosh...who was that blond woman...."  
  
"Shut up, Josh," Donna warned as she cast a sideways glance toward Michael.  
  
"What...you've never uttered that I was, in fact, the man?" he asked smiling broadly.  
  
"Maybe...on one of your better days," she thought giggling.  
  
"I knew it! I am the man!" he boasted. "And I just snagged the AFL-CIO's endorsement for our good friend Sam Seaborn," Josh crowed.  
  
"Seriously? They endorsed already? Primaries aren't even through yet," Donna grinned as she stood up.  
  
"For all intents and purposes, we've got the nomination sown u," Josh explained. "After Andie finished her blabbering, the National AFL-CIO called through and gave me the announcement. Their president is going to release a statement later this afternoon. All that money! The bodies! I am so the fucking man!"  
  
Donna found herself jumping up and down as Josh grabbed her and hugged her tightly and quickly. Toby through open Josh's door. "We got it?" Toby asked.  
  
"I got it!" Josh boasted. "Donna? Didn't I get it? I mean they called me, right? I just told these two," he told Toby. "Hey...ask Matthew over there in the corner," he said gesturing to Michael. "He was here when I got the wonderful news that I, am in fact, still the man."  
  
"He's right you know," Donna said. "I heard his bellow. It was his happy bellow," Donna confirmed, not even mentioning that Josh had once again gotten Michael's name wrong.  
  
Michael sighed and sat down in the corner and watched the jubilee in the room to which he was not a part of.  
  
CJ came in and kissed Josh on the cheek. "C'mon Toby," she said grabbing Toby's arm. "We need to go give the news to Sparky and Mal and get them prepped for the afternoon. Josh still has work to do," she sighed winking and nodding to Donna and Michael on her way out. "These boys are nuts," she smirked.  
  
Josh sat down at his desk for a minute and sighed. "You know what I could use right now?" he asked.  
  
"A good cup of coffee?" Donna offered.  
  
"In fact, yes. That's what I need. Coffee," Josh confirmed.  
  
"Great. When you go, can you get one for Michael and I, as well? Michael just takes his black. I want a non-fat mocha latte with whipped cream on top of it," Donna ordered smiling sweetly.  
  
Instead of busting out laughing, which is what Michael had expected, Josh grinned at her and got up to go to the serving area for the staff. "Doesn't the whipped cream defeat the purpose of the thing being non-fat?" he asked seriously.  
  
"Does it matter?" Donna countered.  
  
"Not really," he guessed and walked out the door.  
  
"What the hell?" Michael asked as Donna glanced back at the door.  
  
Josh popped his head back in and grinned wickedly. "Thanks for being here, Donna," he murmured and then disappeared on his quest for coffee.  
  
"He always wanted me to get him coffee while I was his assistant," Donna remembered.  
  
"And...as his assistant...wouldn't that be part of the job?" he asked in disbelief.  
  
"Nope," she said simply. "I did it twice."  
  
"What were the occasions," Michael wondered out loud.  
  
Then Josh appeared with the beverages. "She was out of sorts those two days is all I can figure," Josh answered for her and winked at Donna as she licked at the whipped cream.  
  
"Thanks," Michael said.  
  
"No problem, Mackenzie," Josh murmured while shuffling through the notes for the thing.  
  
Donna was looking at the information that she had be given when she looked over at Michael and smiled. "Josh," she warned.  
  
"What?" he asked seriously, paying her the utmost attention.  
  
"Work with me here," she smiled sweetly.  
  
"Whatever you want, Donna," he smirked back.  
  
  
  
"Listen and comprehend for me, Joshua," she told him. "His name," she said gesturing to her boyfriend, "is Michael. Understand me?"  
  
"Yes ma'am," Josh smiled at her snarkiness. "Sorry Milford...I mean, Michael," Josh corrected himself, sparing Donna a brief turn of his lips.  
  
"You're impossible," she sighed and got up to kiss Michael on the mouth. "He's an idiot, sometimes, baby," she cooed.  
  
"Hey!" Josh whined. "I'm right here!"  
  
"Hey...you are," Donna laughed. "C'mon. This thing starts in like ten minutes or something. We need to get moving," she ordered. "Michael, you can just hang with us, sweetie," she told him. 


	4. Chapter 4

Part 4  
  
Michael barely had a moment to get up and Josh was already flying down the hall with Donna close at his heels. Michael had to jog to almost keep up. "Don't mind me," he called out to them as Donna told Josh about the groups that he was talking to and Josh made fun of their cause. And no one really did mind Michael.  
  
About two hours later, Josh was finishing up with the Democratic Chair for the State and Donna and Michael were sitting off to the side grabbing some lunch, talking about the turn out and how much money was raised for the day. Michael saw it as pointless, but Donna was thrilled with the event and Michael had to admit he loved seeing her so happy. He smiled as he watched her point out Danny Concannon as the 'man who adores CJ' to him across the way while she picked at her chicken salad and manned Josh's electronical devices. On the table before him were three cell phones, a blackberry pda, and a walkie talkie. He was amazed at her phone skills. One was his personal phone and she answered that "Josh Lyman." Another was his office phone and she answered that, "Deputy Chief of Staff, Josh Lyman." The last was his campaign phone and that was answered, "Seaborn for President, Josh Lyman." It was a complicated plan since two out of the three phones looked the same. But Donna adjusted the ring tones for her little system and she explained the necessity of keeping campaign and work calls separate and what not. Michael was impressed that she handled herself so well. The personal phone rang and Donna grabbed it on instinct, "Josh Lyman," she smiled. "Mrs. Lyman, how are you doing?"  
  
"Donna, my goodness," Josh's mother gushed. "It's been ages since I've heard your voice."  
  
"Yes it has," Donna agreed smiling.  
  
"Darling...how's my boy doing? Is he behaving himself?" she asked.  
  
"Josh is Josh. You know...he's being brilliant as usual," Donna smiled and she knew that made his mother beam more than usual.  
  
"But how are you? Is he still being good to you? I never get to talk to you anymore and he always says you're busy or some other excuse," Mrs. Lyman sighed. "How's school?"  
  
"School's wonderful and I'm completely busy, so he's not lying," Donna promised her. "And your son was always wonderful to me, you know that."  
  
"I'm glad," his mother sighed happily. "Is he still wasting his time with that horrid Amy woman?"  
  
Donna laughed. "In fact he is," Donna confirmed. "Tell him she's all wrong for him. I've done it numerous times and I get nothing but the dirty look. By the way, how's Mr. Stansky?"  
  
"Lou is wonderful," Mrs. Lyman gushed. "I really like him. Josh hates him, so I figure I'm doing something right," she laughed. Then there was a little bit of an uncomfortable silence.  
  
"So...what are you doing answering Joshua's phone, my dear?" she asked Donna, clearing her throat.  
  
"Oh...they're up by my apartment for a campaign thing and I am just volunteering for the day," Donna explained. "No big deal. At the moment, your son is working the Lyman charm on some lovely State officials over by the dessert table...oh! And I think he's bring me cherry cheesecake...what a doll," Donna sighed as Michael snorted and rolled his eyes. "Let me go grab him and my cake," Donna told her and sprinted for Josh smiling.  
  
Josh looked at her and laughed. "You think this is for you?" he asked with a snort.  
  
"In fact I do," Donna smiled. "And I know it is because you hate cherries on your cheesecake. I made it one time and you made the most horrid faces as you swallowed it," Donna told him. "And here," she said handing him his cell phone. "It's your mother. Be nice."  
  
"Did you say anything?" he wondered in a whisper.  
  
"It's fine, Josh. She just wants to say hi to you and make sure you're being nice to me, which I assured her you always are," Donna smiled. "Now talk while I eat."  
  
Donna skipped back over to where Michael was sitting. "Hey honey," she smiled. "Want some cheesecake?"  
  
"Not so much," he commented. "No. Hey," he said. "Are we almost done? I have papers to grade and stuff for tomorrow."  
  
"I don't know," Donna mused. "Once everyone leaves we'll go back to Headquarters I assume and grab some dinner and work the phones. But we can leave once we get there," Donna told him.  
  
"My car is at the President's house," he told her.  
  
"Don't worry. I'm sure they've been moved by now. They're real good about stuff like that," Donna told him reassuringly.  
  
"Whatever," he sighed as he saw the man Donna identified as Danny approach their table.  
  
"Donna? I thought that was you," he said as he leaned in for a hug, which Donna reciprocated.  
  
"How have you been, Danny?" Donna asked with a grin.  
  
"I've been okay, I guess. You? Gosh...it's been...what? Two years or something?" he asked.  
  
"Yeah...about that," Donna agreed.  
  
"Since that night in Virginia," he said remembering.  
  
"That's about right," she smiled sadly.  
  
"Is everything...okay?" he asked hesitantly. "I mean...I was shocked when I heard you left. I knew it was always possible, but...." he trailed off.  
  
"Everything's great. I'm in school up here with Zoey, actually and we've gotten to be close and I'm almost done and I have a job and a place to live and all," she rambled trying to think of everything.  
  
Josh came behind her and put his hand on her shoulder as he tossed his phone down on the table in front of her. "And she has this great new boyfriend...who's...wait for it.....a Republican...named Michael," Josh told him. "Michael, this is White House Correspondent for the Washington Post Danny Concannon."  
  
"Nice to meet you, Michael," Danny said shaking his hand and looking curiously back and forth between Josh and Donna. "So, Donna," Danny laughed. "I thought you were all about jackasses the last time I saw you," he grinned at her and Josh.  
  
"Eh well...you know," she smiled a little. "A girl's prerogative is to change her mind."  
  
"I guess you're right," he agreed and grabbed a seat across from her and Michael, noticing that Josh's hand did not leave Donna's shoulder.  
  
Michael followed Danny's gaze and looked at Josh and Donna, neither one of them noticing the hand at all. "Donna," Michael said. "Now that Josh has a minute to answer his own phones," he said pointedly. "Wanna go take a quick walk?" he asked.  
  
Donna looked up and Josh and he immediately removed his hand. "Would that be okay?"  
  
"Yeah...yeah...go ahead," Josh told her. "I'm just gonna hang here for a little bit. When you get back we'll be getting ready to head back I guess."  
  
"Thanks, Josh," Michael said to him. "C'mon, Donna," he said helping her up and holding her hand as they walked down the path with Josh's eyes blazing holes in their backs.  
  
"So..." Danny started. "How ya doing?"  
  
"I'm good, Danny," Josh answered still gazing after Donna.  
  
"This sucks, doesn't it?" he asked the Deputy seriously.  
  
"Yeah," Josh agreed. "This is almost as bad as not seeing her at all," he remarked.  
  
"Why torture yourself, then? CJ said you could have arranged to stay home," Danny told him.  
  
"I know," Josh sighed. "I just...I had to see her. I've...you know, missed her."  
  
"Well...she's moved on, I guess. That's good. You have too, you know," he told him.  
  
"I know I'm with Amy," Josh lamented. "I'm reminded of it constantly. But I don't think it feels right. When I was with Donna," Josh sighed shaking his head. "Everything seemed right...even though it was in secret and all that. Being with her seemed right. Sitting home and watching CSPAN seemed right. And with Amy...it just seems...I don't know...not right," he said.  
  
"You still love her," Danny said.  
  
"Who?" Josh asked him.  
  
"Who else is there?" Danny asked.  
  
Josh laid his head down in his hands and sighed. "I need to go home," he said. "Home's easier."  
  
"What's wrong with him?" CJ asked sitting beside Danny.  
  
"He misses Donna and he's dating another woman whom he's not entirely sure he should be dating and hates New Hampshire and wants to go home," Danny summed up.  
  
"Oh. That again?" CJ smirked. "Cheer up, killer," she told Josh. "We're booked solid tomorrow and we're outta here the next morning."  
  
"Am I supposed to say yay to that?" Josh asked seriously.  
  
"I don't know what you should say," CJ told him.  
  
"Out of sight out of mind?" Danny asked hopefully.  
  
"Not likely," Josh answered him.  
  
"Okay...then...I don't know what to tell, my boy," CJ smiled. "Donna was your best friend. And now...well...she's gone, Josh. You'll have what you have to remember her by and that's about all I can say. She seems happy with Michael," CJ offered. "And you're with Amy, right?"  
  
Josh smiled sadly and nodded in agreement noticing Danny shaking his head and getting up from the table. "I gotta go talk to Sam," Danny said to them both.  
  
"You mean Congressman Seaborn," CJ corrected him. "I'll come with you. Joshua go find your ex-assistant and let's get ready to go back to Headquarters," CJ told him and Danny nodded his agreement and the two of them left Josh to his electronic devices.  
  
Josh sat in silence, alone for a while until Donna and Michael showed back up. "Hey," she said plopping down next to him.  
  
"Hey," he smiled. "My mother was so happy to talk to you," he said. "Thank you."  
  
"I love your mother," Donna grinned. "And your mother loves Lou Stansky," she teased. "She thinks he's wonderful."  
  
"Shut up, Donnatella," he laughed. "Let's get our stuff and get the hell out of here. They outdoors is bothering me."  
  
"Okay," she smiled. "You ready, honey?" she asked Michael.  
  
"With pleasure," he told her and headed back to the offices followed closely by Josh and Donna.  
  
The ride back to Headquarters was uneventful. Everyone was tired from the day and raring to start up on the phones as soon as possible. When the cars pulled up, Donna and Michael turned toward the parking lot to go home. "Hey," Zoey called as her and Charlie and Josh noticed them leaving the group. "Where are you going?"  
  
"Michael needs to grade papers and stuff, so we're gonna head out," Donna explained.  
  
Mallory and Sam came around the corner. "Stay," Sam said to Donna and smiled broadly at her. "I've barely had a minute to see you," he said. "Tomorrow we're all jammed up and then I'm on the road again. Please, Donna?"  
  
Mallory smiled and nodded in anticipation and Josh seemed to hold his breath for her answer. Donna looked at Michael who shook his head. "Yeah...sure. It's not like you'd be much help with the papers."  
  
"Hey," Zoey called. "Give me a good grade," she smiled sweetly.  
  
"Goodbye everyone," Michael announced. "It was nice to meet you all," he told them. Then he turned Donna around and kissed her softly. "I'll talk to you later," he whispered and then he jumped in his car and left.  
  
"Yay!" Mallory giggled and her and Zoey grabbed Donna's hands and drug her inside to talk.  
  
"You doing alright?" Sam asked Josh as they all headed for the entrance.  
  
"Yeah," Josh smirked. "Great," he said and then went to dutifully see how Amy's day had been.  
  
"Just between you and me, Congressman," Charlie said. "He's not doing so great."  
  
"Yeah...I kinda figured," Sam smirked and then he and Charlie went in search of take-out menus.  
  
"So," Mallory smiled later that night, when they were sitting in the back of Headquarters reviewing the latest polling numbers and eating pizza. "How long have you been in love with Joshua?"  
  
Donna looked up in shock and Zoey spit out her beer. "Well Mal, you get right to the point, don't you?"  
  
"Mal," Donna started. "What the hell are you talking about? Didn't you meet my boyfriend? Michael?"  
  
"Yep. I did. And again, I must ask...how long have you been in love with Joshua?"  
  
"For years and years," Zoey supplied.  
  
"Shut up, Zoey," Donna warned.  
  
"Years, huh? Like way before she left?" Mal pushed.  
  
Zoey nodded briefly and then went back to her beer.  
  
"So why the façade with Mikey?" Mallory asked.  
  
"Josh and I were never going to work. I may have had a crush on my BOSS at one time, but I have Michael now. I am happy with him," Donna said, emphatically biting down on her pizza crust.  
  
"Right," Mallory smiled. "I think he likes you, ya know?"  
  
"Who?" Donna asked.  
  
"Joshua. He's kinda cute when he's following you around like a little puppy dog," she giggled.  
  
Zoey nodded in agreement. "He's a wreck without you, Donna," Zoey offered.  
  
"Well, what's done is done," Donna said. "I am gonna go find Sam," Donna announced as she got up and left the girls to their pizza.  
  
"So if it's done now...it once wasn't?" Mallory asked.  
  
"You were gone a while," Zoey told her old friend. "I can't say anymore."  
  
"Congressman Seaborn," Donna whispered as she came up behind him. "How are you?"  
  
"Why, Donna Moss," Sam smiled. "You look lovely, as always," he told her.  
  
"Thanks, Sam," she said as she sat down next to him. "So...you're gonna be like the President," she laughed.  
  
"Knock on wood," he said.  
  
"Very good," she said sincerely. "You'll be great."  
  
"I hope so," he said quietly. "So...how are you doing?"  
  
"I'm good. Work, school, personal life...the whole thing," she sighed. "I'm finally on my own."  
  
"You don't miss us a little bit?" he asked.  
  
"Sam...of course I do. I miss everyone. I miss twenty-hour days. I miss seven day weeks. Hell, I even miss Josh showing up drunk in the middle of the night yelling at my roommate's cats," she smiled. "It's just...now I am okay on my own, and that feels good, too."  
  
"I get that," he said honestly. "It makes sense. But you were on your own in DC," he reasoned.  
  
"No I wasn't really," she told him. "I depended on you guys...and Josh...I depended on you all too much," Donna sighed. "Now I just depend on me," she smiled. "It's a good thing."  
  
"Yeah?" he asked. "Then...why do you look like you're two seconds away from crying?"  
  
"I," she sniffed. "I just hate seeing you all again and having all this fun and knowing that you're going to be gone after tomorrow night," she told him. "I love you all so much."  
  
"I know," he said with a grin. "We love you, too." Sam looked at her seriously and smiled. "You know...we all miss you," he told her. "Especially Josh. What did he do to finally drive you away?"  
  
"He...he didn't do anything, Sam. It was just time," she told him.  
  
"Right," he smirked. "In the pool I had that he finally called you away from one too many dates for work stuff."  
  
"There's a pool?" she asked.  
  
"Yeah," he told her. "Of why you left," he explained. "And I remember how he used to hate you going out and not being at work with him, so I figure you must have been out with a Mister Right and Josh dragged you away from him and you got pissed or something."  
  
Donna smiled. "Josh didn't do anything wrong to make me leave," she told him. "It was me. All me," she sighed.  
  
"Do you regret it...at least a little?" Josh asked from the hallway.  
  
Sam and Donna looked up at him. "How long have you been there, Josh?" she asked.  
  
"Long enough," he told her. "Why wasn't I in on the pool?"  
  
"Cause you would've won, we assumed," Sam told him.  
  
"Not likely," he sighed, sitting down in the corner armchair.  
  
"I should go," Donna said, getting up. "You guys have work to do."  
  
"No," Sam said, getting up and kissing her on the forehead. "Stay. Talk to Josh. He'll be swamped tomorrow and I know he'd like to spend a little time with you before we all hit the road," Sam smiled at her and Josh. "I'm going to go check on Mal and grab some pizza before her and Zoey eat it all." He walked out and shut the door, leaving Donna standing awkwardly near the exit and Josh slumped in the arm chair.  
  
"Sit," he told her.  
  
  
  
She initially wanted to protest and tell him that she, in fact, was not a dog, but in the end, she did as she was told and sank back into the couch and looked over at him. "Hi," she said simply.  
  
"Hi," he barely registered a smile.  
  
"What did you want?" she asked politely.  
  
"Something that I shouldn't," he told her honestly.  
  
"Josh...." she warned.  
  
"Donna," he whined. "Why do I let you do this to me?"  
  
"I'm not trying to do anything," she told him.  
  
"I know," he said sadly. "That, believe it or not, is worse than doing it on purpose." He ran his hands over his face and through his hair. "I don't know what to do," he told her honestly.  
  
"About?" she asked.  
  
"You," he said simply. "I don't know what to do about you."  
  
"I have no idea what you mean, Joshua," she said looking at him closely.  
  
"Yes you do," he said. "I love you. You know that. I don't know how to stop," he confessed. "Help me stop loving you, Donna. Cause maybe once I do that, I'll be able to be okay again," he said as his eyes filled with unshed tears.  
  
She continued to stare at him, unsure as to what to say to that. "Josh, that's so unfair," she whispered. "You can't blame me for your unhappiness."  
  
"Why do the people I love always go away from me?" he asked her as the tears fell down his face.  
  
"Josh...you're worrying me," she said.  
  
"Well...you, Dad, and Joanie," he said. "You all left me. And somehow it was my fault, I guess."  
  
"Josh, I left for me. Your Dad had a heart attack. And Joanie died in the fire Josh. None of these things are your fault," she tried to reassure him.  
  
"I was too ambitious," he said. "If I'd have just quit you might have stayed. If I'd been around, maybe Dad wouldn't have overworked his heart. If I hadn't been such a baby and only concerned with myself, I could've saved Joanie," he cried, not really focusing on her anymore.  
  
"I wouldn't have let you quit your job. Your father was so proud of you. And Joshua," she sighed. "You were a little boy. You ran out of a burning house. You did what you were supposed to do," she explained.  
  
"I...I don't know what to do anymore," he confessed. "I don't know how to be happy."  
  
Donna smiled at him through her own tears. "Josh...you seemed happy earlier."  
  
"I was. I am happy when I'm with you," he told her. "You make me happy."  
  
"You have to be able to be happy on your own," she told him.  
  
"I don't think that's possible," he breathed eerily.  
  
"Josh," she called him. "Come over here," she ordered as he got up and moved slowly to the couch and sat down next to her in a huff.  
  
"It's going to be alright," she whispered to him, grabbing his face and forcing him to look at her. "Do you hear me? It's going to be okay."  
  
"I don't think so," he cried.  
  
"I do, okay? I promise," she told him.  
  
"I'm just so fucked up Donna," he confessed. "I haven't really been sleeping or...I am just so fucked up," he sniffed.  
  
"Shhhh," she hushed him and moved over so he could rest his head in her lap. He laid down and cried on her legs as she ran her fingers through his hair and lulled him to sleep. It'd been years since she'd seen him like this.  
  
Once he fell asleep, she was afraid to move so she sat there. For hours it seemed. Finally Toby popped his head inside. "Hey," he whispered noticing Josh on the couch. "Everything okay?"  
  
She smiled at Toby, "Would it be bad if I said no?"  
  
"No," he smiled back and sat down near the couch. "How's our boy doing?"  
  
"He's not doing so good, Toby," she answered honestly. "I'm kinda scared."  
  
"He'll pull through," Toby told her. "He's been like this on and off," Toby leveled with her. "He's been seeing Stanley more frequently."  
  
"He hasn't tried to hurt himself, has he?" Donna asked, scared.  
  
"No. Nothing like that," Toby sighed. "He's just got this whole worthlessness thing going on at the moment. He doesn't feel happy with Amy and he can't pinpoint why. And then he misses you so much," Toby smirked. "He feels like you left him and he can't figure out how to deal with that quite yet."  
  
"I don't know what to do," Donna said.  
  
"Do you love him Donna? I mean, despite everything. Do you still love him? Regardless of Michael or his job or your job or whatever?" Toby inquired.  
  
Donna looked at Toby and shook her head. "I can't do this," she said as she started to get up.  
  
Josh jerked away from her and she looked at him sadly and smiled. "I have to go now Josh," she told him.  
  
"I'm sorry," he told her.  
  
"It's not your fault, Josh," she told him honestly. She kissed his cheek and nodded to Toby and left the room.  
  
"I'm going to bed," Josh informed Toby as he left the room.  
  
Josh walked out of the room and Toby sighed. "Good night," he said to no one in particular.  
  
Zoey ran into Donna in the hallway. "Hey," she smiled at her friend. "Where's the fire?" Then she noticed Donna's tear-stained face. "What happened?"  
  
"Nothing. Can we go home? I just...I need to get out of here," Donna said, breathlessly as she left the office.  
  
"Um...okay," Zoey said skeptically. Then she saw Josh leave Headquarters for his room. "Josh?" she called.  
  
"Not now, Zoe," he called over his shoulder and continued walking.  
  
Zoey looked down the hallway to Sam's office where Toby was staring out the doorway. "A little help here?" she asked.  
  
Toby shook his head. "Thank God we're leaving after tomorrow."  
  
"I'll go talk to her," Zoey offered Toby. "Make sure he's okay," she said pointing to where Josh just went.  
  
"Yeah," he said quietly and went to his task. "I didn't sign on to be a freaking therapist," he muttered while walking away.  
  
Zoey got to the car and Donna was inside pulling herself together. "Donna?" Zoey asked when she joined her in the car.  
  
"Don't Zoe," Donna sighed. "Just don't okay?"  
  
"Okay," Zoey said as she hugged Donna.  
  
"I just wanna go home," sighed Donna. "And I want Josh to go home too." 


	5. Chapter 5

Josh walked bleary-eyed into his and Amy's room with Toby at his heels. "J?" she asked when she got a look at his puffy eyes.  
  
"Not now," Josh ordered back.  
  
"Josh," Toby called opening the door to the room without knocking.  
  
"What the hell, Toby?" Amy yelped, wrapping the blanket more tightly around her body in bed. "A little knocking wouldn't kill you."  
  
"No, it probably wouldn't," Toby agreed and walked past Amy and drug a chair in front of where Josh was sitting by the table. "What's going on, Josh?"  
  
"Toby...just...can we just...not tonight. Okay?" he asked helplessly.  
  
"No. I'm sorry. We will have to talk about this now. Josh, now. We're in the middle of a fucking campaign cycle. I can't afford to have you crack up now. Not after everything else these past few years. Sam can't afford it either. I need to know where your head is," Toby demanded.  
  
"It's right here," Josh seethed.  
  
"I don't believe you," Toby said plainly. "I can wait here all night," he said, settling back in his chair.  
  
"We're not doing this here," Josh told him.  
  
"Josh? Everything okay?" Amy asked, suddenly worried.  
  
"Yeah...I just need to talk to Toby for a minute or two," he told her. "I'll be right back," he tried to smiled as he made his way to the door with Toby following him closely.  
  
They made it down to Toby's room quickly and in complete silence. Toby pulled out a chair for Josh and sat down on his bed. "Okay," Toby said. "Are you okay?"  
  
Josh looked at him for a long while before answering. Then he whispered, "Not at the moment, no."  
  
"Am I calling Stanley?" Toby asked.  
  
"I'll see him when I get back," Josh promised. "I'll call his office in the morning."  
  
"You scared Donna tonight, Josh," Toby told him.  
  
"I'm aware of that," Josh said coldly.  
  
"You can't keep getting lost in yourself," Toby sighed. "I don't know how much longer I can keep this whole thing quiet."  
  
"I know, I know, I know," Josh cried, frustrated. "I just...I knew I needed to see her again...just to, ya know...see her. But then, once I did...I couldn't get enough. Then I...I just went a little over the edge. I don't even know what I was saying. All I know is one minute I was fine and then the next I was crying her lap like a blubbering idiot about how all of my loved ones abandon me or some shit like that. I think...I guess being near her fucks me up or something."  
  
"She loves you, you know," Toby told his friend. "No matter what and in spite of even herself, that girl loves you and worries about you way too much," he smirked. "I have no clue what you did to deserve her, but I am glad that she's there for you."  
  
"She's not though," Josh said. "Not really. She's here. In New freaking Hampshire with Michael and Zoey."  
  
"Josh...would you like to be her friend again?" Toby asked him.  
  
"I...I don't know if I could go back to just being her friend," he sighed.  
  
"Would you like to find out?" Toby asked. "I really think having a friend in Donna would be good for your right about now."  
  
"I...I...I just want to be happy again," Josh confessed.  
  
"And you're happy when you talk to Donna?" Toby smiled knowing the answer.  
  
"Yes," Josh said quickly.  
  
"Then...be her friend. Don't throw your relationship with Amy in her face. Inquire about Michael, by his real name, every once in a while. Email her. Call her on the phone. Visit her. Be. Her. Friend," Toby said simply.  
  
"I can try," Josh sighed. "It can't be worse than this, right?"  
  
Toby laughed, "Probably not; no."  
  
"Thanks, Toby," Josh said seriously.  
  
"It's what I do," Toby replied. "Now get out of my room. I need to call Andie"  
  
"I should call Donna," Josh thought out loud.  
  
"No," Toby stopped him in his tracks. "You should get your ass back to your girlfriend and be a good boyfriend for once. Donna'll be around tomorrow."  
  
"But we've got the day jam-packed," Josh said exasperatingly.  
  
"Make time for your friend, Josh," Toby told him. "Call her before we start to pack up tomorrow night or something," he suggested.  
  
Josh shook his head in agreement. "Night," he sighed.  
  
"Yeah," Toby agreed.  
  
By the time Josh got back to his room Amy was laying awake in the dark. He thought she was sleeping so he quietly got undressed and threw on a pair of shorts and hopped into bed beside her. "  
  
"Hey," Amy whispered as he lay beside her.  
  
"Yeah," he answered back.  
  
"You okay?" she asked.  
  
"I will be," he told her.  
  
"Can I help?" she offered.  
  
"No," he told her honestly and rolled over to go to sleep.  
  
"Okay," she whispered knowing that this had everything to do with the inordinate amount of contact that he'd had with Donna the last couple of days. She sighed and rolled over as well. She knew that their relationship wasn't what he wanted or even needed at this point. She was a challenge to him. He liked arguing with her more than he enjoyed sleeping with her. Once she figured that all out...she became increasingly more aware of his habits and tendencies. Upon investigation she came across a guy who knew a guy who told her that his friend's cousin was a reporter who had a juicy story of a White House Senior-staffer screwing his secretary and that the story got squashed by the higher-ups and it was buried under paperwork. She knew that Josh had a thing for Donna. She accused him of that many times during their previous two attempts at a relationship. After the second time they broke up, Josh seemed unusually content. He and Donna were leaving the office before 11 PM on some days. If she paired that up with the rumor from the guy's friend's cousin or whatever, she thought, it seemed to jive. She was just with him now out of habit. Out of habit and for lack of a better word, desperation. It's hard to meet people with shitty hours like me, she often thought. Josh was easy. He was predictable. Their relationship was comfortable and politically sound. She hated it. She waited till she knew he was asleep and then she rolled back over and kissed his head and smiled softly at him. He looked like a little boy, she thought. His eyes were still puffy from crying and his hair was out of place. He looked nothing like hard ass Josh Lyman, political specialist. If his enemies could see him now they'd die, she thought. She made up her mind. She'd help him through whatever it was he needed - then she was out of there. She was going to go find herself love, not just a warm body to keep her company in the wee hours of the morning. She smiled to herself and closed her eyes. They had a busy day ahead of them.  
  
Donna didn't say much to Zoey on the way home. She'd managed to stop crying and compose herself by the time they'd reached her apartment.  
  
"You need me to come up?" Zoey asked her friend.  
  
"No," she sighed. "I'm just going to call Michael and then hit the bed. I have class tomorrow all day."  
  
"I took off cause the family's leaving after tomorrow," Zoey told her. "I want to tag along to all of their stops. They're not getting back in town till like 11 or something tomorrow night," Zoey informed her. "So...maybe if you need to call Josh....you should do it in the morning or something?"  
  
"I said all I needed to say to him tonight," Donna told her. "I'm fine," she insisted.  
  
"Why do you both torture yourselves?" Zoey asked.  
  
"Good night, Zoey," Donna told her with a firm smile as she exited the car and jogged up her steps.  
  
Zoey sighed as she watched Donna disappear into her building. She picked up her phone and called Toby's room.  
  
"Yeah?" he asked into the phone.  
  
"Is Josh okay?" Zoey quickly asked.  
  
"He will be...eventually," Toby told her. "How about Donna?"  
  
"I don't know," Zoey told him honestly. "She didn't really want to talk about it."  
  
"I told Josh that he should try to make nice with Donna. Do the friends thing for the time being," Toby explained. "He misses her. He knows that she's not available as anything other than a friend right now and I think that he's okay with that more or less. He just needs her, you know? They've always had that weird kind of connection," Toby continued.  
  
"I know," Zoey agreed. "I think it would be good for the both of them."  
  
"Okay, kiddo," Toby smiled. "I gotta sleep. I'll see you later on?"  
  
"Yeah," she confirmed. "I'll be hanging out with you guys all day."  
  
"Okay," Toby smiled. "Night."  
  
"Night," she smiled and hung up the phone.  
  
Donna got to her apartment and jumped in the shower. She just wanted to forget everything. She wanted to be Donna Moss, college student/waitress again. She was good at that. No stress. No big problems. No past memories. She liked that Donna. This Donna...this Donna was a different story. She had allowed herself to get swept up in it again. In a few short days she had managed to let Joshua Lyman charm his way back into her life and that sucked. It sucked because she was so weak that she let it happen, she thought. She just let herself go back to being that girl again. She wanted to take care of him. She wanted to help him. And God help her she wanted to kiss him. But he'd be gone in a day or so, she thought. He'd be gone and she'd be able to readjust into her life with Michael...as Donna Moss: college student/waitress. She closed her eyes and let the hot water fall over her body and she had the sudden to sleep. She dried off and lay in bed and quickly drifted off to sleep. She was woken up by the sound of her ringing phone. She glanced at the clock - it read 2:47 AM. She reached for it, "Hello?"  
  
She was greeted with silence. "Hello?" she tried again.  
  
Still nothing. She could, however, hear light breathing on the other end. "Josh?" she asked, quietly.  
  
Josh sat on the floor of his hotel room with his back pressed up again the bed he was just in with Amy. He was holding the phone to his ear...just listening to the sound of her voice.  
  
"Josh?" she whispered again. Still nothing, she thought. "Good night, Joshua," she tried instead. "I'm going to sleep now. So should you. You'll be cranky in the morning. I'll call Sam and make him refer to you as 'Deputy Downer' for the entire day if you don't get some sleep now," she warned.  
  
He smiled at her quirkiness and sighed into the phone.  
  
Donna smiled at that. "I'm hanging up after you, Joshua. So...hang up," she told him. "Good night," she said.  
  
He smiled and hung up the phone and got back in bed.  
  
Donna looked at the phone for a moment before she hung up. She had class in less than 7 hours and she had to sleep and cram for a test still, she thought. She huffed and rolled over and closed her eyes. It's never gonna end, she thought as she drifted off to sleep.  
  
The next morning came and with it, Michael found his way over to Donna's for breakfast before her first class. "Morning, sunshine," he said as he breezed in with coffee and bagels. "How was your night?"  
  
She forced a smile and checked her make-up one last time before leaving her bedroom. She was pleased that she managed to cover up the bags under her eyes. "It was fine," she said. "Oooh! You brought coffee," she cooed. "You're my hero!"  
  
He laughed and kissed her cheek before sitting down to join her for breakfast.  
  
"Did you finish your papers?" she inquired.  
  
"Yes...they took forever," he labored. "Those kids are so damn long- winded."  
  
"Did Zoey do good?" she asked.  
  
"It's well, funny girl," he laughed. "And yeah...she'll be happy with her grade."  
  
"Yay!" Donna cheered as she put cream cheese on her cinnamon raisin bagel. "So I have class this morning," she told him. "And then I have to do a paper. Then I have the afternoon shift at the pub and then I am back at the library for the rest of the night," she whined.  
  
"Poor baby," he sighed. "Anything I can do to help?"  
  
"Not really," she smiled. "But thank you so much for offering."  
  
"You're friends are leaving soon?" he asked.  
  
"Tomorrow morning," she confirmed. "I'll call Mallory and the girls maybe later on. But...I think I've said my goodbyes to everyone else."  
  
"You'll miss them," he smiled at her, verbalizing what she was thinking.  
  
"Yeah," she sighed. "I allowed myself to get wrapped up in it again," she laughed. "I tried so hard to just ignore their visit...I have been pretty good about separating myself now from what I was then."  
  
"Maybe you shouldn't," he spoke up, surprising himself more than her.  
  
"Huh?" she asked.  
  
"Maybe you should allow yourself to remember that time and your friends," he told her. "I mean, I've never seen you so happy. You were laughing and smiling more than I think I've ever seen," he admitted. "I'm sorry that I can't make you happy like that," he sighed. "But if your friends can do that for you, then maybe you should be friends with them."  
  
Donna looked at him and smiled sadly and sweetly. He was really trying to do what was best for her, she thought. She got up and wrapped her arms around his neck. "I love you," she whispered. "Thank you so much for saying that."  
  
"I just want you happy, Donna," Michael smiled at her.  
  
"Thanks," Donna whispered. "I have to get ready go," she said quietly.  
  
"You'll think about what I said?" he asked. "Maybe when they all get home...you know, you can give them a call or something."  
  
"Yeah...that might work," Donna giggled. "Lock up on your way out, for me baby?"  
  
"Of course, sweetheart," Michael obliged.  
  
Donna's day dragged. From school to the computer lab to work to the library. Throughout the day she called CJ, Mal, and the rest of the girls on their cell phones to say goodbye. While on the phone with them, she managed to send her love to Sam, Toby, and the President and First Lady.  
  
As she was leaving the library by cab around 2 AM she felt an overwhelming urge to just drive by the hotel that everyone was staying at one last time. Once she was there...she told the cabby to go and got out. She wandered around and noticed a computer light on inside the Headquarters. She tried the door and let herself in. She found Josh sitting on a couch near a desk in the corner. "What are you doing here?" she asked quietly.  
  
"I could ask you the same question," Josh retorted. "In fact, since I work here and you...like...don't," Josh started to argue, then he stopped. "Why are you here?" he asked instead.  
  
"I...um...I saw the light on....and...I just..." she started to ramble.  
  
"Donna...it's 2 o'clock in the fucking morning," Josh said accusingly. "What the hell are you doing out at this hour alone?"  
  
"I was at the library...doing homework. I took a cab here and when I saw the light on, I just asked the cabby to leave," she told him honestly.  
  
Josh smiled. "Did you get your homework done?" he asked cockily.  
  
"Yes, I did," she laughed. "Thank you very much."  
  
"Good girl," Josh told her. "You know? I am very proud of you, Donna," he told her.  
  
"Yeah?" Donna asked.  
  
"Of course, Donna," Josh said. "You're doing what you always wanted to do. You're doing it on your own terms just like you wanted. I think you're amazing," he breathed.  
  
Donna smiled. "I think you might be a little bit biased," she whispered through her tears.  
  
"Maybe," he said honestly with a smirk. "But who the hell cares, right?"  
  
"Thank you Joshua," Donna told him. "I appreciate that so much."  
  
"You deserve that and so much more, Donna" Josh said, looking in her eyes.  
  
"I'm proud of you, too, you know," Donna smirked.  
  
"Yeah?" Josh asked. "For what?"  
  
"For being you. For running the country with President Bartlet and soon with Sam," Donna said. "You've had many obstacles, Josh. You are a great man and you're destined to do great things," Donna whispered through her tears.  
  
Josh smiled at her. "Thanks," Josh said surprised at her outburst. "I...uh..I don't really know what to say."  
  
"I don't want you to say anything," she smiled. "I just wanted you to know that I admired you."  
  
"And I admire you," he answered.  
  
They both smiled at each other. "You leaving?" he asked suddenly.  
  
"Should I?" Donna asked.  
  
"I wish you wouldn't," he told her.  
  
"Okay," she smiled as she got up and joined him on the couch.  
  
"Toby says I should try to be friends with you," Josh told her  
  
"Yeah?" she asked as she settled herself against him as he put his arms around her. "And what do you think?"  
  
"I'm not sure it's possible for me to just be friends with you, Donna," Josh told her honestly.  
  
"Can you give it a try, Josh?" she asked.  
  
"You want to be friends with me?" Josh asked a little shocked.  
  
"I miss you too much not to want to try. In fact, Michael encouraged it," Donna told him.  
  
"So you want me to agree with your Republican boyfriend?" he asked with a grin.  
  
"I want you in my life," Donna corrected him.  
  
"I love you too much not to try, Donna," Josh whispered as he pressed a kiss in her hair.  
  
"I'm tired," Donna murmured, curling into his body closely.  
  
"Sleep Donna," Josh whispered into her hair as he ran his fingers through it, lulling her to sleep.  
  
Soon after she fell asleep, he followed after her.  
  
The next morning, Donna woke up. Alone. She was curled up with a pillow on a couch in the Headquarters. Alone. Josh had wrapped her in a blanket and left her with a watch and a note.  
  
She opened her eyes and focused on Zoey's eyes staring at her.  
  
"What happened?" she asked Donna.  
  
"Nothing," Donna answered sitting up and looking at the watch and note. "He left?"  
  
"About an hour ago...he didn't wanna wake you. He said he'll call you later," Zoey said, shocked. "You guys are talking now?"  
  
"He wants...we want to try to be friends," Donna explained. "We talked last night."  
  
"What's the note say?" Zoey asked noticing Donna staring at it with Josh's father's watch.  
  
"It says, 'Time will tell, Donnatella,'" Donna smiled at Zoey.  
  
"That is his Dad's watch?" Zoey asked, knowing the answer. Josh loved that watch.  
  
"Yeah," Donna sniffed. "I always loved this watch."  
  
"You gonna be okay?" Zoey asked.  
  
"Of course," Donna smiled. "I have to get home. Michael'll be worried." 


	6. Chapter 6

The Fourth of July...  
  
It had been months since she'd last seen Josh, Donna pondered as she pinned up her hair. But being his friend helped. It was hesitant at first. Neither one of them would know what to say when the other one called...just basic stuff like that. But with patience and practice, they made it work. Donna Moss once again knew all of the intricacies of Josh Lyman's life and she couldn't have been happier. Josh would call her when he was "da man" at the office and she'd call him for help on a paper. It was odd...yet comfortable.  
  
Life seemed to get easier for both of them too. Josh was less agitated and Donna more outgoing. It was an odd relationship, of course. Amy couldn't really deal with it. She had known that things were not right for a while. And once they got back to DC in March, she suggested they go back to being friends and make their relationship entirely platonic. A blow like that would have normally sent Josh into an uncontrollable tailspin. But he'd begun seeing Stanley weekly, as per Toby's insistence, and he had an outlet in Donna. Instead, he told Amy that he appreciated her honesty and ability to see them for what they were. They still saw each other because of work and functions, but that was that and Josh couldn't have been more pleased.  
  
Michael had some adjustments to make as well. He had, in fact, encouraged Donna to keep in touch with her old friends and he knew that Josh was part of that package. He didn't realize that her friends kept such horrid hours, of course, when the original suggestion was made. It was commonplace for Donna's phone to be ringing at 3 or 4 o'clock in the morning - and the call was either a good night or a good morning one. She would talk to CJ and Mallory and Margaret at least once a week. Then, of course, there was the occasional chat with Toby or Sam. And last but not least, the constant banter with Josh. Michael had to laugh sometimes because it seemed that Josh would call to get Donna to sing his praises more often than not. But Michael couldn't complain. The last few months had been great. Donna was happy almost all of the time. She was involved in the campaign - albeit for the wrong party he often told her - but still involved. She had one summer class and her and Zoey had been hanging out at Zoey's parents' farmhouse more often recently because of the lake on the property. He and Donna had also become closer. He loved her and he could definitely envision sharing his life with her. Before she had always been a little hesitant around him and now she wasn't at all. She was comfortable and that made him smile. And later, when he asked her to marry him and she accepted, he thought, all would be right with the world.  
  
"Almost ready, babe?" Michael asked her as he stuck his head into her room while she was inspecting herself in the full length mirror.  
  
"Uh huh," she smiled at him and threw her arms around him for a tight hug. "Are you sure you can't come to the picnic tonight?"  
  
"Yeah, baby," he said with a sigh. "But I want you to go...all your friends will be there."  
  
"But...you won't be," she pouted as her cell phone rang. "What?" she said into it.  
  
"We'll be at the hotel in like an hour," Josh told her. "Don't be late. We like to be greeted."  
  
"We'll be there," she smiled. "Michael's coming this afternoon, then he's off to see his mother in Vermont for a couple of weeks," she whined. "Thank goodness you guys'll be here for like a week or so...I think I'd drive Zoey crazy," she laughed as Michael kissed her head and drug her outside.  
  
"Well...you and Michael get your asses down here," Josh commanded with a grin.  
  
"You called him Michael," Donna said astounded.  
  
"I am a quick learner," Josh supplied as he hung up.  
  
"He's an idiot," Donna laughed.  
  
"But he makes you laugh, so I like him," Michael told her with a grin.  
  
"I love you," Donna told him as she climbed in his car.  
  
"And I adore you," he told her getting in on the drivers' side.  
  
She leaned over and kissed him soundly on the mouth and he melted into the kiss.  
  
"Donna," he whispered as he pulled back a little for air. "Marry me."  
  
"What?" she asked, thinking she heard wrong. "Are you serious?"  
  
"I love you, Donna Moss. I think you're the most amazing woman in the world and I want to spend my life with you and only you," he told her. "Would you please do me the honor of becoming my wife?" he asked, presenting her with a ring.  
  
Donna looked from the ring to the Michael and back again. She looked up into his eyes and smiled at him with tears glistening down her cheeks. "When?" she asked simply holding out her left hand in anticipation of the ring.  
  
"I love you," he told her as he wrapped his arms around her.  
  
"I love you, too," she smiled.  
  
Donna was happy, she decided. Michael was a good man. He loved her. She loved him. They got along. He learned to appreciate her friends and her beliefs. She could depend on him. When he said he'd be there - he was. He kept to a strict schedule and he was predictable. He was the anti-Josh, she thought with a smile. Wait, she wondered, why the hell she was thinking in terms of Josh...anti or otherwise. This can't be good, she pondered. Then she relaxed when she thought that it must be because he's in town or whatever. That's all. No worries.  
  
Josh made it to the hotel quickly, in anticipation of Donna's arrival. He missed her and couldn't wait to put his arms around her once again. He made it up to his suite and was confused. "Zoey?" he asked when he walked in and saw cake and balloons everywhere. "Did I miss a birthday?"  
  
"No silly. Donna and Michael got engaged this morning," Zoey explained. "I am throwing them a "yay party," she told him, like it was obvious.  
  
"So this is a good thing?" Josh asked.  
  
"Joshua," Zoey warned. "Don't do this to her."  
  
"Don't do what?" Josh asked.  
  
"Don't make her feel bad about this," Zoey told him. "She's been happy these last few months. And Michael really does love her."  
  
"I know," Josh said. "I get that, Zoe. I just want her happy, too. If this makes her happy...then great. I'll dance at their wedding."  
  
"You really won't," Zoey laughed.  
  
"I am thinking, no," Josh conceded.  
  
"Cause you're still..." Zoey hedged.  
  
"Cause I'm still?" Josh asked.  
  
"You still love her," Zoey smiled sadly.  
  
"When did you become so perceptive, Ms Bartlet?" he asked.  
  
"Charlie brings it out in me," she giggled. "Now...don't leave...I'm bringing everyone back here for Donna and Michael's party," she informed him.  
  
Donna and Michael made it up to Josh's room before Zoey and her gang returned. So they found Josh alone in the room with balloons and cake. He was running his index finger around the side of the cake to taste some of the frosting. "Josh?" Donna asked, startling him.  
  
Josh turned around and quickly licked the icing off his finger. "Um...surprise? Congrats? Zoey said it was a 'yay' party so I am not really sure what to say...yay, maybe?"  
  
Donna looked at Josh and noticed that his smiled didn't quite reach his eyes. He knows, she concluded. "How did you find out already?" she asked, trying to seem upbeat.  
  
"Um...Zoey told me," he admitted.  
  
"I called Zoey earlier and told her today would be the day," Michael told her. "I was going to call and let her know if you said no, of course."  
  
"Congratulations, Donnatella," Josh smiled softly at her and reached to hug her.  
  
"Thanks, Josh," Donna whispered, suddenly realizing that the reason the proposal wasn't pure perfection was because Michael called her Donna and not Donnatella.  
  
Josh pulled back and shook Michael's hand. "Congrats, man," he said. "Donna's a good girl. You're a lucky man."  
  
"Don't I know it," Michael smiled warmly at Donna as the rest of the crew burst through the door.  
  
"Oh! You've beaten us," Zoey shrieked upon seeing them.  
  
"Congratulations," was chorused throughout CJ, Danny, Toby, Sam, Mal, Magaret, Leo, Will, Bonnie, Ginger, Zoey and Charlie. Then hugs and kisses and tears were exchanged.  
  
Donna showed off her ring and laughed with her friends and they all gorged themselves with cake.  
  
Michael smiled at her. "I am so happy you said yes," he confessed.  
  
"Me too," she smiled back.  
  
"I have to go tell my mother now," he lamented.  
  
"I wish I could meet her," she nodded.  
  
"I know, babe. Soon - I promise," he told her.  
  
"Okay. Be careful, have fun and come home soon," she ordered.  
  
"I will. I'll see you in a couple of weeks. I'll call all the time," he promised and bid his goodbyes to everyone else and then left for the airport.  
  
"Hey," CJ and Mallory said coming to sit by Donna. "You're getting married!" Mal smiled.  
  
"You're getting big," Donna countered touching Mal's belly.  
  
"September can't come soon enough," Mallory confessed. "I feel like a house."  
  
CJ laughed and put her arm around her friend. "You're carrying our little Sparky, Jr, young lady. No complaints," she ordered. Turning to Donna, "Let's see the rock," she said.  
  
Donna obliged them and they fawned over it for a reasonable amount of time. Then, the party started to dissipate. Everyone had to go and change for the barbeque at the Bartlet Farm later that evening.  
  
Josh remained on the couch watching Donna and Zoey hug goodbye - like they weren't going to see each other in like two hours, he laughed.  
  
When Zoey left Donna turned to Josh and smiled, "So..."  
  
"You went off and got engaged," he said.  
  
Blunt and to the point. That's Josh.  
  
"It wasn't like that," Donna sighed and sat down next to him. "I had no idea he was going to propose."  
  
"And you love him?" Josh asked.  
  
"Yes, I do," she told him.  
  
"Does he love you?" he asked, looking at her intently.  
  
"Yes," she confirmed.  
  
"More than I love you?" he asked.  
  
"Joshua," she sighed. "Please don't," she begged.  
  
He smiled and his eyes got all crinkly and her heart damn near melted it.  
  
"Donna," he whispered, as his face drew closer to her.  
  
"Mmm?" she asked, afraid to talk.  
  
"I am going to kiss you in like ten seconds," he warned. "So if you'd rather I not...I suggest you get up now."  
  
She stared at him and her eyes filled with tears but she did not move. She didn't even dare to breathe.  
  
He moved closer and captured her lips between his. Her hands remained in her lap and his one came up to cup her cheek. His mouth left her's for a moment so he could move the angle and deepen their kiss and she allowed herself to be led. His tongue dueled with her's and she felt like she was floating through the air.  
  
As she moaned into his mouth she remembered what she was doing. She was engaged and kissing her FRIEND in his room while her fiancé just left her to visit his mother. She pulled away quickly and her hand went immediately to her mouth. Her cheeks were flushed with heat. "I...I'm s-s-sorry," she sputtered. "I don't know what came over me," she told him.  
  
"Donna," he tried. "I didn't mean to upset you...I just...I missed you," he said simply.  
  
"We're friends, Josh," she told him.  
  
"I love you," he retorted.  
  
"And I...Josh, no. We decided to be friends. Be my friend, Josh," she whispered harshly.  
  
"It won't happen again unless you want it to," Josh promised her.  
  
"Good. So it won't happen again," she predicted.  
  
"I'm sorry," Josh sighed. "I don't know what the hell I was thinking."  
  
"It's okay...we both got a little nostalgic I guess," he admitted.  
  
"Friends?" she asked looking hopeful at him.  
  
"Friends," he smiled and hugged her tightly.  
  
Her eyes fell closed and she squeezed him with all her might. He held on tightly and breathed in the smell of her strawberries and cream shampoo and smiled at the memories that it brought back.  
  
"I am still gonna love you," she smiled as he began to stroke her hair.  
  
"Okay," she smiled.  
  
She left his room to go and visit with Sam and Josh sighed and took a shower.  
  
They arrived at the barbeque separately but managed to get into the swing of things easily. The President and the First Lady were fabulous hosts as usual and they had a perfect blend of fun and work.  
  
Sam was set to win the Party's nomination the next week and Will was going to be on his ticket. Mallory was due in like three months. Donna was engaged. Josh was miserable. Toby sighed. All was right with the world, he thought.  
  
Danny Concannon and CJ wandered around to the back deck and sat down on one of the picnic tables' benches. "So...Donna's engaged," Danny said raising his eyebrows.  
  
"Yeah," CJ sighed. "I have to say, I didn't see that one coming," CJ said honestly.  
  
"How's Josh handling it?" Danny asked, concerned.  
  
"He...he didn't really say much on the ride over," CJ told him. "And he's a little mopey right now," CJ said. "But I guess that's to be expected...right? I mean...I'm sure it wasn't what he was expecting coming up here."  
  
"Yeah...that's gotta suck. Poor guy," Danny agreed. Then they continued to eat their dinners.  
  
Charlie and Zoey were sitting on the front steps after eating. "So," Charlie started. "Donna and Michael, huh?"  
  
"Yeah," Zoey smiled. "I'm happy for her," she told him.  
  
"I don't get it," he said. "She loves Josh...Josh loves her. What the hell is the problem?"  
  
"Sometimes love isn't enough?" Zoey offered. "Besides...her and Josh would always equal scandal. Dad doesn't need it. Sam doesn't want it. Josh can't afford it."  
  
"It's always about work, isn't it?" Charlie said shaking his head.  
  
"You're almost done with this gig, baby," Zoey smiled. "Then...you're all mine," she giggled and kissed his cheek before running inside.  
  
"I want to go home," Donna whispered to Mallory mid-way through her fifth or sixth drink.  
  
"Why honey?" Mal asked. "Aren't you having fun?"  
  
"No," she sighed. "I need to get out of here. I'll be back," Donna sighed as she ran through the house to the front stairs. She ran past Charlie and didn't look back. She situated herself on the driveway, on the trunk of a limo. She was drunk. She was upset. She was engaged. Josh was here. All of these things were bad separately, she thought. But no...tonight they were together. Josh found his way through the house and sat on the front steps with Charlie.  
  
"Drunk yet?" Charlie asked.  
  
"Not enough," Josh sighed. "She looks good," Josh said nodding to Donna ahead of them. "Don't you think?"  
  
"Yeah," Charlie agreed. "I am liking the hair," Charlie told him honestly.  
  
"Yeah," Josh agreed. "It's not usually up like that. It's kinda hot," he slurred.  
  
"You're not handling this too well," Charlie deduced.  
  
"Not at all," Josh sighed and took another gulp of his beer. "Wish me luck," Josh said and went off to where Donna was.  
  
He sat next to her and offered her the remains of his beer. She took it. She drank it. She handed it back. "You're a gorgeous drunk," he smiled at her through his own glassy eyes.  
  
"I want you, Josh," Donna told him honestly.  
  
"Donna...you're engaged. You're also drunk. I can't...I mean...we shouldn't do this. You'll regret it," he told her, trying to focus on her eyes.  
  
"Fuck it," she said. "Get in the car. We're leaving," she ordered and got off the trunk and entered the vehicle followed closely by Josh.  
  
He got in, told the guy to take them back to his room, and moved the privacy blocker in place.  
  
"Donna," he whispered. "Let's just talk later, maybe," he suggested.  
  
It was in vain, though. She moved forward and kissed him square on the mouth. Her hands ran through his wavy brown hair and his went to the pins in her hair to remove them.  
  
"We shouldn't be doing this," Josh tried to tell her as her hands found their way to his shirt buttons. "Donna," he warned.  
  
"I can be quiet," Donna promised as her cool fingers tortured his warm flesh. "I just...I need to do this now," Donna breathed. "I need you now or...I don't know...I might never get the opportunity to do this again."  
  
"Donna," he sighed as his mouth blazed a trail down her neck. "If we do this...it can't be just this one time," Josh told her. "I won't be able to do it just once. I know what it's like to miss you."  
  
"Josh," she breathed. "Make love to me. Right now," she told him as her hands found their way to his pants.  
  
His hands moved to remove her shirt and she shifted her legs around his middle. Her skirt hitched up and his hands moved down to her legs. Her breathing got heavier and she moaned as he rocked her hips against his. Her hand freed his erection from his boxers and she squirmed out of her panties. "You're sure?" he asked.  
  
"Now, Josh," she ordered. "Now."  
  
He did. They did. It was more than he could have wanted in his drunken state. The limo driver had left them alone once he made it back to the hotel. After they made love, Donna curled herself into his body and fell asleep. She woke up later to the sound of her ringing cell phone.  
  
"Mmmm," she whined. "Hello?"  
  
"Hey, babe," Michael called into the phone.  
  
"Michael," she cleared her throat and gave Josh a look. "Everything okay? How's your mother?"  
  
"It's all good," Michael told her. "How's the picnic?"  
  
"It's good," she smiled. "I'm having a great time," she said looking Josh in the eye.  
  
"Good, baby," Michael said. "I'll talk to you tomorrow," he promised. "Goodnight. I love you."  
  
Donna smiled. "I love you, too."  
  
Then she hung up and looked at Josh. "I think this...this could work."  
  
"What?" Josh looked at her like she was nuts.  
  
"Did you not have fun?" Donna asked. "What he knows...it won't hurt him right now."  
  
"You want me to carry on an affair with you?" he asked.  
  
"If you don't want to be with me, I'd understand," Donna reasoned. "I just...I don't know what to do right now. I love you and I love Michael. Maybe we can just...you know...do the friends thing...but add the sexual benefits a bit?" she asked.  
  
"You're still drunk," he accused.  
  
"Maybe," she smiled. "But God, I've missed you Josh."  
  
"Me too," he said, kissing her forehead.  
  
"So...it'll be like before?" she asked.  
  
"A secret?" he asked. "I think that's best...don't you?"  
  
"Yeah...our friends tend to gossip," she smiled.  
  
"These next couple of days you'll work with me?" he asked hopefully.  
  
She smiled. "Of course."  
  
"And if you get...horny...you'll sleep with me?" he asked with a smirk.  
  
She kissed him in response.  
  
This was not a good thing, he thought. But still...he was going to go with it, he decided as he led her upstairs as the fireworks lit up the night sky. 


	7. Chapter 7

It was a great night – the last night at the Convention. It was great, Josh thought. His oldest friend in the world was nominated to be the next President of the United States. Will was his running mate. He was going to be Leo in five and a half short months. He just had to get through the actual election process first - then he'd use from November to January to change offices. It'd been a freaking fairytale. He called his mother when Sam accepted. Donna called Michael to tell him the good news. Then there was the party to end all parties. And they ended up back at her apartment - again. They had tried to be with each other at the hotel a few times over the course of the last week and a half. But, their friends, he decided, were entirely too clingy. That was the only way to describe the constant interruptions - visits, phone calls, constant pages - it was never ending.  
  
But somehow, all seemed right at this moment. He was laying on her couch with her curled to him and wrapped in her favorite old afghan. They had decided on the couch after relentless arguing as to why the bed was wrong - Josh was happy that he won that argument. He sighed and wrapped his arms more tightly around her and her fingers started tracing the scar on his chest lightly and then her lips trailed behind.  
  
"Mmmm," he moaned. "Morning."  
  
"You're still beaming," she said smiling up at him.  
  
"I'm a happy man," he told her, running his fingers through her hair.  
  
"As you should be, Mr. Chief of Staff, Sir," she giggled.  
  
"I go home, soon," he told her.  
  
She sighed and pushed herself up so she was sitting. "Yes," she answered, kissing him on the mouth lightly.  
  
"What am I going to do?" he asked.  
  
"Josh...you said you could handle this," she said, frustrated. "I asked you before..."  
  
"I know, I know," he huffed. "And I can. I was just saying that...I'm gonna miss this...I'm gonna miss you, Donnatella," he smiled at her smile when he said her name. He loved that he could make her smile like that.  
  
"You leave tomorrow morning," she smirked when he looked confused. "I've been keeping your schedule, silly."  
  
"And Michael's coming back?" he asked.  
  
"Yes, Josh," she sighed.  
  
"I have to be at work soon," Josh said, looking at her intently. "Wanna conserve water together?" he asked with a devilish grin.  
  
"You, Mr. Lyman, are impossible," she laughed as she followed him to the shower.  
  
At the hotel...  
  
"Where the hell is Josh?" Toby asked, stalking down the hotel floor again and banging on his door.  
  
CJ stuck her head out of her door, "What's wrong?"  
  
"Josh...he's not answering his door," Toby sighed. "I haven't really seen him since the party after the thing last night. I mean...I know I saw him there...but then we came back here and there was more partying...but I don't remember Josh."  
  
"I don't really either," CJ recalled. "But maybe he just is hung over or something...it's not inconceivable."  
  
They turned in the direction of the door down the hall to see Zoey sneaking out of Charlie's hotel room. "Miss Bartlet," Toby called, making her turn around in a start.  
  
"Toby! CJ! I was just...I mean...I..." Zoey tried. "Morning," she smiled.  
  
"Have you seen Josh?" CJ asked, ignoring the situation.  
  
"Not since the party last night at the Convention," Zoey told her. "Why? Did you all lose him again?"  
  
"Possibly," Toby admitted.  
  
"Did we call Donna?" Zoey asked. "Maybe she knows where he's at. Those two have been buddy-buddy again these last two weeks."  
  
"Um...I haven't," CJ remarked as Danny came down the hallway.  
  
"Who'd we lose?" he asked with a grin.  
  
"Josh," Zoey supplied.  
  
"Last time I saw him was at the Convention," Danny mused.  
  
"Us, too," Toby said.  
  
"So, we think it is wise to call Donna?" Danny asked.  
  
"Who the hell else would know?" Charlie said, coming out of his room to stand by Zoey.  
  
"They've been back to their bantering ways these last few days," Zoey agreed.  
  
"I should call her," CJ sighed reaching for her cell phone and dialing Donna's apartment.  
  
Donna's apartment...In the bathroom...  
  
"Did you hear something?" Donna asked as she wrapped her arms around Josh's wet back to grab a towel.  
  
Josh turned around and smiled at her, "I love you," he said.  
  
"I know that. I didn't ask that," Donna smirked.  
  
"Do you love me?" Josh pressed.  
  
"I'm with Michael. We're getting married," she reminded him as she reached for her robe and wrapped a towel around her wet hair.  
  
"So?" he asked.  
  
"So?" she laughed. "Josh...you know what this is...it's just a thing," she smiled hopefully. "You still okay with that?"  
  
"Donna..." Josh started and reached for her face. "I'll take what little I can get of you," he whispered as they heard the knocking on the front door.  
  
"What the hell?" Donna asked. "Get in the bedroom. Stay there. Use the fire escape if necessary."  
  
Donna walked to the door and opened it revealing CJ, Danny, Toby, Charlie and Zoey. "Morning, guys," she smiled at the group.  
  
"It appears that we have lost Josh," Toby informed her.  
  
"And we were hoping that you could tell us where we might find him," CJ finished.  
  
"Since you are apparently the keeper of Josh," Danny muttered, earning a glare from CJ and Toby.  
  
"I haven't really seen Josh since last night," Donna began. "Can I get you guys some coffee or..." she stopped noticing she was all out of coffee, "...or maybe some juice or something?"  
  
"No," Charlie answered. "I think we just need Josh."  
  
"Well," Donna sighed. "Unless I've stowed him in my closet," she laughed. "He's not here."  
  
Then there was a knock on the door. "Jeez..." Donna muttered. "Who the hell else could possibly come over?"  
  
She opened the door and then laughed. It was Josh. Donna smiled and gave him a curious look and he mouthed 'fire escape' to her and winked. "Hey guys! Morning, Donna," he smirked. "I brought coffee."  
  
"Where the hell have you been?" Toby started.  
  
"I was in my room," he answered, setting the 'box of joe' on her kitchen counter. "Should I have been elsewhere?"  
  
"Why didn't you answer the door?" CJ pushed.  
  
"Passed out?" Josh asked. "I have no idea. Maybe I was in the shower or something," he supplied. "We're you worried?"  
  
"Apparently so," Danny smirked. "You're lucky we didn't send out the troops, I suppose."  
  
Charlie laughed and Zoey hugged Josh. "I was worried," she whispered.  
  
"Have no fear," he smiled. "Josh is here. And he brought coffee!"  
  
Donna rolled her eyes and Zoey giggled and they all grabbed mugs for coffee.  
  
"So," CJ began as they all sat down. "Donna? When's Michael come home?"  
  
Only Zoey noticed Josh cringe.  
  
"He'll be back soon," Donna smiled.  
  
"Excited?" CJ asked.  
  
"Yeah," Donna answered.  
  
"So...when are you two gonna tie the knot?" Charlie asked.  
  
"Um...we're thinking of maybe February...around Valentine's Day. I kinda want a winter wedding...and Michael wants to do what I want," Donna gushed.  
  
Josh groaned and shook his head. "I am gonna go and meet with Sam," Josh said.  
  
Donna sighed and tried to meet his eyes, to no avail. "You sure?" she asked him.  
  
"Yep," he said. "I'm a busy man. I need to win a Presidential Campaign."  
  
"Uh huh," she tried to smile.  
  
"And you, my dear," he smiled, but it didn't reach his eyes, "need to plan your wedding. Don't forget my invitation."  
  
"How could I?" she smiled sadly at him.  
  
Josh nodded and then he looked at the rest of the occupants. "You all coming?"  
  
A chorus of yeses came from the rest of them. They all hugged Donna goodbye and they promised to call her before they left the next day.  
  
Donna was filled with a mix of joy and sorrow when Michael came home. It was the same day that Josh left. She was on the phone with him when Michael let himself in.  
  
"Be careful," she told him.  
  
"Always, Donnatella," he whispered. "I'll miss you."  
  
"Me too," she smiled. "I'll see you at the end of October," she told him. I'm coming down for the week before the Election to help out and all. Then, if Sam deems me worthy enough, I'll be back down there in January for the Inauguration."  
  
"You'll be here," he promised.  
  
"Donna!" Michael called.  
  
"Michael! You're home!" Donna shrieked. "Josh, honey, I gotta go," she told him and hung up. "Michael! I've missed you, baby," she cooed as she kissed him hard on the mouth.  
  
"Hey sweetie," he smiled at her. "Mom can't wait to meet you and I brought you plenty of bridal planning shit for you to feast over."  
  
"Yay!" she screamed. "We're getting married in like seven months!"  
  
"Yes we are," he laughed. "Who would've thought that like a year ago we'd be engaged today and I'd know the highest ranking officials in the evil Democratic Party quite well?"  
  
"Me," she laughed as she kissed him and drug him to her bedroom.  
  
Three and a Half Months Later....  
  
"Baby...it's only till the second," Donna reasoned with him as she was preparing to get in the car with Zoey.  
  
"I know...I just...I'll miss you," he whined.  
  
"Michael! Then come with us," Donna begged.  
  
"No...it's too much. I mean...I might even vote for the guy...but I don't think I can help him campaign this last week. What would my colleagues think?" he asked with a smirk.  
  
"I love you," she told him as she kissed him lightly and her phone rang. "Yes?" she asked impatiently into her headset.  
  
"Are you coming home?" Josh asked.  
  
"I am coming to DC, if that's what you mean," she remarked, kissing Michael again.  
  
"I miss you," he whispered.  
  
She smiled a little at his sweetness. "Josh...you're going to win another Presidential election."  
  
"I know," he grinned. "I'm da man."  
  
"I know," she grinned. "I'm hanging up now," she laughed.  
  
"I'll see you soon," he whispered before he disconnected.  
  
"Bye, Michael," she whispered and jumped in the limo just before it sped off.  
  
"You okay?" Zoey asked.  
  
"I'm good," Donna smiled.  
  
"You're okay with leaving Michael to spend time with Joshua?" Zoey asked.  
  
"I'm visiting my friends," Donna corrected. "Not leaving my fiancé or just visiting Josh."  
  
"I know...but you know what I meant," Zoey huffed. "Nevermind...how goes the wedding plans?"  
  
"They goes," Donna smirked. "You're still up for maid-of-honor duties, right?"  
  
"I can't wait," Zoey gushed.  
  
"I am almost completely done planning everything. After Christmas and New Year's it's smooth sailing. I really think that I'm gonna be happy," she smiled.  
  
"Yeah?" Zoey asked.  
  
"Yeah." Donna answered.  
  
Once they arrived in Washington, all hell broke loose. There were reporters and photographers surrounding the White House as well as the local campaign offices. It was chaos. Donna was in her element. She loved it. Josh met Zoey and Donna at the airport and was with them until they reached the downtown Headquarters. Then he dropped Zoey off in the custody of Charlie and grabbed Donna into the first dark room he found and hugged her tightly. "Missed you," he whispered into her hair.  
  
"Josh," she warned. "We have to work."  
  
"I know," he muttered.  
  
"You need to be 'da man'," she sighed.  
  
"I thought I was," he smirked.  
  
"You are," she laughed. "Now let's get to it."  
  
"You're impossible," he joined in her laughter as they got to work on the latest polling numbers.  
  
The week and half went by very fast. Election Day came. It was the most important day in Josh's life. He'd help win elections in the past. But this...this was his day to shine. And he had Donna to share it with - more or less, anyways. The morning Donna spent holed up with Mallory, Margaret and the rest of the girls - including the newest Seaborn, Gabriella. Donna adored her and she was honored beyond belief when Mallory and Sam approached her and Josh the night before to be Godparents. Josh cheered when they asked and Donna cried. The Christening was going to be before Christmas so it wouldn't interfere with the Inauguration.  
  
It was 10 AM when Josh made his way into Oval Office to find the girls cooing over Gabbie by the seal on the carpet. To his surprise The President and First Lady were playing right along with them and he had to laugh. "Ladies, Sir, Ma'am," he said when he found them.  
  
"Josh," they all smiled.  
  
"Donna...we need to get to work," he told her.  
  
"Josh...it's morning still," Donna whined. "Nothing can be determined at this point. We have hours."  
  
"Yeah...give her a break Josh," The President smirked.  
  
"Thank you, Sir," Donna smiled at the President and glared at Josh.  
  
"Move it," he ordered. "We've got numbers and GOTV locations to check on in the Metropolitan Area. I have an Election to win," he crowed.  
  
"Of course when we win, it'll all be you," Abbey laughed.  
  
"Of course Ma'am," he smirked. "I'm ...." he began.  
  
"Da Man," the room erupted with laughter.  
  
"I'm glad you all see it my way," he smiled. "Donna? Shall we?" he asked offering her his arm.  
  
She kissed Gabriella on the cheek and said her farewells to the room and reached for his arm and allowed him to lead her out of the room.  
  
The day was filled with yelling, numbers and lots of wind. But in the end, they were all smiling and back in the White House for at least another four years. President-elect Samuel Seaborn trumped the competition. He won in all demographics and the Bartlets were thrilled to be passing the torch on to such worthy individuals.  
  
There were parties and interviews and everything that Donna used to think she always wanted. But one thing was missing from the picture - Michael hadn't come down and she missed him. In the middle of party number fourteen, she grabbed Josh and pulled him in the hallway. "Josh?" she whispered.  
  
He was a little drunk and he struggled for a moment to focus on her. "Donna? Are you okay?" he asked.  
  
"Yes. I just...I want to go home," she stammered.  
  
"Donna," he whined. "It's our big night." He sighed and leaned up against the wall and raked his hands through his hair. "How can you do this to me right now?"  
  
"I'm...Jesus Josh...I'm not doing anything to you! And it's not really 'our' big night. It's your's and Sam's and Mal's...not mine. I don't work for you anymore. I am here to VOL-UN-TEER," she said slowly. "And I'm about done now."  
  
"Donna," Josh said astonished. "How can you say that?"  
  
"Josh...I miss Michael...I have a wedding to plan...I don't have time to follow you around anymore," she cried.  
  
"Donna? Where the hell is this coming from? I thought you liked helping me out?" he asked, confused.  
  
"I do, Josh," she sighed. "I just think...I mean...I'm getting married. It's irrational for me to spending my time chasing after my ex-lover, you know? It's...I don't know...It's not right," she decided. "I want to go home now."  
  
She attempted to smile at him and he shrugged helplessly and wrapped her in a hug. "I love you," he whispered as she cried on his shoulder.  
  
"Maybe you shouldn't" she whispered.  
  
"Not possible," he told her. "So...when do I get to see you again?"  
  
"The Christening," she told him. "Then for Sam's big day. Michael and I will be down. for both"  
  
"I'll send you your Christmas gift, I suppose," he whispered into her hair.  
  
"And you'll get your Hanukkah gift via good ole USPS, as well," she sighed.  
  
"I get eight," he reminded.  
  
"You'll be lucky you get one," she joked and poked his ribs.  
  
"I'll get you home - tonight," he promised.  
  
"A plane?" she asked, as she wiped the tears from her face.  
  
"I'll arrange for a plane for you. You'll be home in less than forty-five minutes," he promised.  
  
"So this is it?" she sniffed. "Why does this feel so...I don't know...final?" she asked through her tears.  
  
"Cause it is," he said simply. He moved closer to her and lightly kissed her lips as his fingers wiped away her tears. "Goodbye, Donnatella," he whispered and looked at her for a moment before turning, flipping up his cell phone and making the arrangements for her trip home. 


	8. Chapter 8

So Donna went home to Michael. And the next month went by fairly quickly. And before Donna knew it...she was officially Gabriella's Godmother and Josh was her Godfather. If they kinda weren't speaking so much it would've been decidedly more enjoyable. But Donna didn't really mind. She was busy gushing about her wedding plans. It was fun...she just wished that Josh's continued squirming would end soon.  
  
Before she knew it though, she was back in New Hampshire. It was almost Christmas and she'd been staring at the box in front of her for more than an hour. Zoey poked her in the arm, "Open the damn thing already," she pressed.  
  
"I just don't know...I mean...I totally didn't expect this," Donna sighed. "We haven't really been...on the best of terms lately."  
  
"Because you're getting married and crushing Josh's fragile ego," Zoey supplied.  
  
"Josh's ego is hardly fragile," Donna laughed.  
  
"It is when it comes to you," Zoey told her. "What?" she asked when Donna gave her a dirty look. "I pay attention to things."  
  
"Whatever," Donna huffed as she went at the box with a letter opener. "It's a book," she laughed. "A book on the wonders of Hawaii," she laughed. "See? I want skis I get a book on skis. I want to go to Hawaii and I get a book on how lovely it is."  
  
"He's too much," Zoey laughed as Donna opened it and glanced at the inscription.  
  
Donnatella~ Merry Christmas. I know this is like a million years too late, but I hope you and Michael enjoy Hawaii. I just thought the book would make you laugh. I love the way you laugh...  
  
Love Always, Josh  
  
Donna had tears in her eyes as the plain tickets and hotel reservations fell out of the center of the book.  
  
"Are you serious?" Zoey shrieked as she saw the falling tickets and then she grabbed the book and read what it said. "He's giving you and Michael a trip?" Zoey asked as she looked at the flight dates. "He's sending you on your Honeymoon," Zoey said in awe.  
  
"Can you believe it?" Donna whispered, reaching for the phone to call him.  
  
"Josh?" she asked as he answered the phone.  
  
"Yeah...Donna...what's up?" he asked.  
  
"Hawaii?" she whispered.  
  
He smiled at her happiness as he fingered his gift in his hands. The note she sent along was hilarious.  
  
Josh ~ Wear this and be on time for something once in a while. This watch doesn't suck.  
  
Love, Donna  
  
"I like my gift, too," he smirked.  
  
"It's a lovely watch, don't you think?" she laughed. "And get this - it works!"  
  
"I noticed," he smirked. "So...you like your gift?"  
  
"I love it," she gushed. "Thank you so much. Michael will be so excited."  
  
"I want pictures when you're there. I always wanted to see how you smiled by the water there," he mused.  
  
"I promise," she smiled.  
  
"Merry Christmas, Donnatella," he whispered.  
  
"Happy Hanukkah, Joshua," she smiled and they both hung up the phone.  
  
"I don't believe him," Donna laughed as she looked at the tickets again. "Michael's gonna flip out over this!"  
  
"Josh is a generous man," Zoey marveled. "It's a wonder some nice girl hasn't snagged his heart by now. Oh..yeah..nevermind..." she laughed. "He's been there...done that!"  
  
"Shut up, Zoey!" Donna laughed throwing a pillow at her.  
  
Just then, Michael came home. "Michael," Donna yelled when he walked in. "Josh Lyman is the most wonderful man alive," she gushed.  
  
"And in fact, da man, at the moment," Zoey added.  
  
"Music to every man's ears..." Michael laughed as he kissed Donna on the cheek. "...adoration for his fiancé's old boss who seems to have a slight obsession with her."  
  
Donna smiled. "He gave me...us...a trip to Hawaii...for our Honeymoon!"  
  
"Seriously?" Michael asked, shocked.  
  
"He can be incredibly sweet at times," Zoey offered, flipping through the channels on the television.  
  
"I don't understand...why would he do that?" Michael asked, confused.  
  
"Because when I worked there, I always wanted to go. He never gave me the trip, obviously. And now...he feels incredibly guilty," she smirked.  
  
"That's one reason," Zoey tossed in.  
  
"Did you call him?" Michael asked.  
  
"Yep. I thanked him from the both of us. Next time he calls you can thank him yourself," she told him.  
  
"If not, I'll do it when I see him in January in DC," Michael promised. "He really is a good guy," he mused.  
  
"I told you so," Donna grinned and went back to flipping through her book on Hawaii.  
  
The holidays flew by and before they knew, Donna, Zoey, and Michael were on their way back down to Washington, DC to watch President-elect Seaborn be sworn in as the next President of the United States. Zoey was filled with both excitement and sadness. Sam being the President meant her father would be a former President and that kinda sucked, she thought. But still...she was so happy for Sam and Mal. They deserved it so much. Josh actually met them at the airport and escorted them to the awaiting limo.  
  
Michael cleared his throat, "Josh?" he asked.  
  
"Yeah," Josh asked as he looked across the car at Donna and Michael. Michael looked nervous and Donna was smiling at him.  
  
"I just...I wanted to say thank you," he told him. "For the tickets and all...it means a lot to Donna...and to me."  
  
Josh smirked, "Not a problem. I was a jerk of a boss to her so I figured I'd try to make it up somehow. And maybe get you to like me too," he added. "I know at the beginning I was a bit of a jerk," Josh went on. "But I think you and Donna are really perfect together and I am happy that she found that kind of happiness," he said sincerely.  
  
Donna leaned across the car and kissed his cheek, "You're da man," she whispered.  
  
"You're a good guy, Josh," Michael smiled at him and shook his hand. "Donna's lucky to have such a great person in her corner."  
  
"I'm lucky to know her," Josh told him honestly. "I'm a blessed guy."  
  
Zoey smiled at all the niceness in the car, "Okay...can we move this limo any faster?" she asked in a huff. "There's too much sweetness going on back here. What happened to bitterness?"  
  
They all laughed and awaited the Inauguration that brought them all together.  
  
Later that evening, everyone including the Bartlets' and the Seaborns' were headed from ball number four to ball number five. They were all laughing and talking and smiling along the rope line. Michael, Donna, and Josh were in the middle of the pack with Charlie and Zoey directly in front of them and CJ and Danny directly behind them. Scattered throughout their group were The President Bartlet and Abbey, President Seaborn and the First Lady, Vice President Bailey, Leo, Toby, Margaret, Bonnie, Carol, and Ginger. Donna was laughing at Zoey tripping on the way to the cars and Michael was turned around asking Danny a question about the people he was just introduced to. Then, everything stopped.  
  
There was like a second of total silence before shots and yelling rang through the air. Secret Service Agents surround the Seaborns' and the Bartlets' completely. Zoey managed to grab onto Charlie as she was tackled to the ground so that he was with her. Danny threw his body on top of CJ's and held her face to the ground despite her yelling. He knew that he was hit. But he suspected that it was only in the shoulder and although his arm hurt like hell, he needed to be sure that CJ was okay.  
  
Donna looked around and couldn't tell where the shots were coming from. She was thrown to the ground and her head hit the blacktop hard. "Donna," she heard Josh whisper before her eyes fell shut.  
  
At the hospital later on Donna woke up in a room, alone. "What happened?" she called out as a nurse came into the room.  
  
"What's your name, honey?" the nurse asked.  
  
"Donna Moss," Donna told her. "Where's the President? Is he okay?"  
  
"Where were you earlier tonight, dear?" the nurse continued.  
  
"I was at the balls," Donna told her, looking more scared. "Was anyone hurt?"  
  
"Sweetie, you hit your head pretty bad," the nurse explained. "You have a slight concussion and you were bleeding a bit."  
  
Donna touched her head and felt the bandaged and looked down at her perfect pink dress that was now spotted with blood. "Who was hurt?" she asked more directly as Zoey burst through the door.  
  
"Oh my God, Donna," Zoey exclaimed as she wrapped her arms around her best friend. "Are you all right?"  
  
"Are you?" Donna asked quickly.  
  
"Yeah," Zoey sighed. "Just bruised is all. The Agents were quick," she smirked. "How's your head?"  
  
"It hurts," Donna smiled. "How's everybody else?"  
  
"I don't know much yet," Zoey told her honestly. "I know my parents are okay. Sam and Mal are okay too. They're all actually at the White House under lockdown. Will was taken to his residence safely as well. Everyone else, I think, is still here."  
  
"I want to find everyone," Donna said as she got up and attempted to leave the room. She got suddenly dizzy and held her head as she sat back down.  
  
"No, no, no, young lady," the nurse ordered. "Sit yourself right back down. You can't leave this room yet."  
  
"Don't worry Donna...as soon as I hear something, I'll let ya know," Zoey promised, kissing Donna on the cheek.  
  
"Thanks, Zoe," Donna whispered with tears brimming in her eyes. "I hope they're all okay."  
  
"Hey," Zoey smiled. "Cheer up, buttercup! They've done this before. They're seasoned veterans at this sorta thing," Zoey tried to joke, but her laughter didn't reach her eyes.  
  
Zoey left Donna's room and went into the secured waiting room that had been assigned for their group. It was like before - private and no reporters. She was alone in there for now and she didn't know if that was a good or bad thing, she realized. She closed her eyes and put her head in her hands just as Charlie found his way in.  
  
"Zoey?" he whispered. "You okay?"  
  
"Charlie," she whispered getting up and throwing her arms around him and squeezing him tightly. "You're okay?"  
  
"Yeah," he said quietly. "I broke my wrist in the fall," he explained waving his cast a bit to show it off. "You? Everyone else?"  
  
"I'm bruised, but good," she explained. "I don't know much else, though. My parents and Sam and Mal and Gabbie are at the White House under a lockdown. Will is at his new residence under lock and key as well. Donna's in a private room down the hall with a concussion and that's all I know at the moment."  
  
"Thank God you're alright," he whispered as he drew her lips to his for a kiss. "Zoey...I don't know what I'd do if anything happened to you," he told her. "I love you," he told her. "You know that, right?"  
  
"And I love you too," she smiled and kissed him lightly on the mouth. She laughed, "I know you know that."  
  
"We all know that," Toby told her, as he entered the room. "You kids okay?" he asked concerned.  
  
"Broken wrist," Charlie offered.  
  
"Bruised body," Zoey reported.  
  
"Your parents and the President and First Lady are okay, yes?" Toby asked her.  
  
"Back at the White House, safe and sound. Will's at his residence as well," she told him.  
  
"Good," Toby sighed and slumped back into the seat. "I just checked on Andie at home," he explained. "Thank goodness she wasn't with me when it happened," Toby sighed. "At any rate, she's with the kids. What's going on with everyone else?" he wondered.  
  
"Um...we don't know much," Charlie told him. "Donna's got a concussion...that's about all we know."  
  
"Josh?" Toby asked.  
  
"I haven't heard anything," Zoey whispered solemnly.  
  
"Somebody has to know something around this place," Toby yelled as he slammed his hand into the wall. "Where the hell is everyone else?" he yelled.  
  
"Mr Ziegler," Dr. Morris said as he walked into the wall. "Don't hurt yourself on the wall. My ERs are tied up at the moment," he smiled. "I think I can help you."  
  
"What's going on?" Zoey asked, worried and gripping Charlie's and Toby's hands.  
  
"Donna Moss is in Exam 3 with a concussion. She'll be fine," he assured them. "Danny Concannon is recovering from a gunshot wound in his upper shoulder. There's a risk of infection and we need to get the bullet out. So, he's in ER2. CJ Cregg is waiting for him by the room. She's fine, but worried sick," he explained as the group before him sighed and Bonnie, Carol, and Ginger ran in and hugged the occupants. "Margaret," the doctor started and everyone held their collective breath. "She needed stitches on her face from her fall. She'll be fine," he assured. "Josh Lyman is fine. He's waiting on news of another one from your group - Michael Winston. Michael is in surgery. He lost a lot of blood and Josh is in his wing awaiting the news. Leo is at the Residence right now with the Presidents and their families. He rode with them in the motorcade."  
  
There was a collective sigh of relief. Everyone hugged each other relieved that most made it through okay. "Poor Donna," Zoey said. Everyone looked at her. "What am I supposed to tell her?"  
  
"Nothing yet," Dr. Morris told her. "Nothing till we know something worth telling. And then...be honest." The man smiled at them all and nodded his head before wandering out the door.  
  
"I'm going to find CJ," Toby announced, but ran into Josh as he was leaving the door. "You okay, man?" Toby asked concerned immediately.  
  
"No," he whispered and sat down in the first seat he saw.  
  
"What happened to Michael?" Zoey asked in a whisper.  
  
"He died," Josh said out loud for the first time.  
  
Zoey cried and Charlie wrapped his arms around her tightly.  
  
The girls held each other and cried as well - too shocked to do much else.  
  
"I should...I mean...I should've grabbed him too - on my way down, I mean," Josh rambled. "Maybe if I did...maybe he'd still be okay..."  
  
"Josh. Stop this. It's not your fault," Toby told him.  
  
"Are you sure?" Josh asked. "I saved myself. I saved Donna. Why wasn't I quick enough to drag Michael down, too?"  
  
"Josh," Zoey whispered, moving nearer to him to touch his shoulder. "I'm so happy you're okay," she told him through her tears. "I don't know what I'd do without you."  
  
"What will Donna do without Michael?" Josh asked with tears in his eyes. "They were getting married next month."  
  
"I know," Zoey sobbed. "Oh God...I have to go tell her. She'll want to know what's happening."  
  
"No, Zoe," Josh said, forcing himself up. "I'll go," he said. "I want to."  
  
Zoey looked at Toby questionably and Toby nodded his agreement with Josh's decision. "I'll be here when you're done," she told him as she moved to sit next to Toby and he smiled and nodded before he walked out the door.  
  
"I don't know what to do," Zoey sighed as Josh left the room. "What if she's not okay?" she asked, turning to Toby for guidance.  
  
He put his arms around her trembling body and kissed her head. "She has to be," Toby said simply, not really believing that to be the truth. "Josh'll see to it," he promised.  
  
"But...what if he's not okay?" Zoey asked in an eerie whisper. "Didn't he seem too calm just now?"  
  
"I'll keep an eye on him," Toby promised her. "Don't worry Zoey. We're all gonna get through this - somehow."  
  
Josh took a deep breath to steady himself before he pushed open Donna's door. She was sleeping - somewhat peacefully. He walked to her bedside and pulled a chair up next to her. He stared at her for a minute before reaching out to take her hand in his. With his free hand, he stroked her hair off of her forehead. She didn't wake up for a while and Josh was in no hurry for her to do so, he realized. How was he supposed to tell her that her life was completely changed now? How would she react to the news that her fiancé was simply gone - no rhyme or reason - just gone? He closed his eyes and replayed the events in his mind - the silence, the sound of bullets, the yells, grabbing Donna and shielding her body with his own, not reaching far enough to pull down Michael. What if she blamed him? He squinted his eyes closed tighter as the memories danced through his head. Problem was that this shooting was mixing with Roslyn. He saw Michael bleeding on the ground one moment and then himself the next. Sometimes Donna was around - sometimes he was alone. He began to shake his head and he took both of his hands and covered his puffy eyes - attempting to rub them for clarity. This sudden movement startled Donna.  
  
"Josh?" she whispered half asleep and with a smile. "You're okay," she sighed. "I was so worried about you," she told him honestly.  
  
"I'm fine, Donna," he tried to smile. "And thank God, so are you."  
  
"Yeah...I hit my head on my way to the ground," she sighed. "Thank goodness it's hard," she tried to joke.  
  
"Donna..." Josh started.  
  
"How is everyone else? The staff... the Presidents?" she pressed.  
  
"Sam and his family and the Bartlets are all at the White House with Leo," he smiled when she let out a sigh of relief. "Will's at his residence, Bonnie, Ginger, and the other assistants are good, Charlie and Zoey are fine for the most part, Margaret needs stitches or something, CJ's with Danny - he got hit in the shoulder and they're operating as we speak," he told her. "He's gonna be fine," he promised when he saw her expression darken a bit. Then she smiled...and he almost lost it right there. "And Toby's fine, as usual," he smirked.  
  
"Great," she smiled. "Thank God, right?" She shook her head and was running through everything in her mind. "Do they know who did it yet?"  
  
"Not yet - or at least they didn't tell me yet," he answered honestly.  
  
"Okay," she smiled. "I am gonna try and get some more sleep," she told him with a hazy smile. "I am so tired. Could you tell Michael to come in when you see him? I guess I can have visitors now - I couldn't before."  
  
Josh looked at her straight in her eyes. "Donna?" he whispered. "Michael got his pretty bad out there," he tried to say as calmly as possible.  
  
"Oh my God! Is he in surgery? How could they not tell me this? He's my fiancé," she cried in disgust. "Josh! Take me to him," she begged.  
  
"He lost a lot of blood," Josh continued. "There was nothing....I mean they tried...." he tried to get out.  
  
"Josh?" she asked as her eyes filled with tears and she reached for his hand and gripped it tightly.  
  
"Donna," he whispered as he kissed her hand lightly. "Donna...Michael didn't make it," he told her. "I'm...God...I'm so sorry...I don't know what to say," he shook his head.  
  
Donna looked at him as the tears made their way down her cheeks. "He's...he's...dead?" she asked and Josh nodded slightly.  
  
"But...he...he can't be," she cried. "We're getting ma-marr-married next month," she got out. "I have a dress and Zoey's gonna be my maid-of-honor and you're gonna walk me down the aisle," she told him with a smile on her face that was anything but happy.  
  
"I know, baby," he whispered as he stroked her hair back and kissed her forehead.  
  
"It can't be true," she told him, shaking her head.  
  
"I wish I was wrong," he whispered.  
  
"I need to be alone," she told him, as she pulled away from him and began fiercely wiping away her tears.  
  
"Are you sure I can't stay with you?" he asked.  
  
"I just need to be alone," she said in an even voice.  
  
"Okay," Josh relented and left the room and collapsed in front of the door. He stayed there for a while - listening to her sobs. 


	9. Chapter 9

Abbey Bartlet made her way into the hospital under immense Secret Service protection. She was ushered to the secluded waiting room where she saw her daughter and Charlie huddled in a corner and CJ and Toby talking quietly on a couch. Everyone else had pretty much gone home, she'd assumed. Zoey looked up when she heard the clicking of the door.  
  
"Mom," she whispered and ran over to her and threw her arms around her neck. "How's Daddy? And Sam and Mal? And Will? And Leo?"  
  
"They're fine. They're all safe. Everyone's fine," Abbey assured her daughter as she kissed her forehead. "What happened?" she asked the room when she noticed their obvious discomfort. "CJ?" she asked, walking in front of the Press Secretary who was still huddled closely with Toby. "Is Danny okay?" she asked, suddenly worried.  
  
"Ma'am," Toby stood up. "Danny's fine...he had to have surgery to remove bullet fragments, but he's gonna be just fine," he said, smiling a little at CJ when he announced that.  
  
"And everyone else?" she asked.  
  
"Michael...he was killed," CJ whispered, holding Toby's hand for support.  
  
"Oh my God," Abbey gasped as she sat down. "Where's Donna? That poor, poor girl," Abbey cried. "Zoey? Have you seen her, sweetie?" she asked through her tears.  
  
Zoey shook her head and began to cry again.  
  
"Ma'am," Charlie began. "Donna had a concussion and some bleeding. She was in a room for observation. Josh went down to give her the news. He was upstairs for Michael's surgery. He wanted to be the one to give her the news," he said, quietly.  
  
"How is Josh?" Abbey asked Toby.  
  
"I..He...I don't really know," Toby answered honestly. "He seemed together - I guess, when he went to Donna's room. But," he glanced at his watch. "But that was over an hour ago," he sighed. "I haven't seen him since."  
  
"Where's her room?" Abbey stood up and moved to the door.  
  
"I'll take you, Mom," Zoey told her. "Charlie? You want to go back to the White House? Check on Dad and Sam for me maybe?"  
  
"You'll come there when you're through?" he asked, worried.  
  
"I won't be long," she promised him and kissed him on the cheek. "Mom?" she asked. "Do Sam and Mal mind us crashing at their house tonight?"  
  
"I doubt it," Abbey smiled at her daughter. "I think they're happy for the company, honey." And then Zoey led her mother out of the waiting room by the hand.  
  
"I'm gonna go check on Danny," CJ announced as Charlie was putting on his coat. "Be care leaving, Charlie," she cautioned.  
  
"If he's awake," Charlie said. "Give Danny my best."  
  
"Of course," she smiled. "Tobus? You coming?"  
  
"For a bit," he sighed. "Then I want to get home. I want to see the kids," he said with a sad smile and a shake of his head.  
  
"Yeah," CJ smiled and they walked to the elevator hand-in-hand.  
  
Zoey and Abbey found Josh slumped in front of Donna's door. His clothes were a mess. His face was stained with tear tracks. He hand blood splotched all over him. His hair was more out of control than usual. And his eyes were puffy and red. He was clutching a handbag in his hands and stroking it absently. He didn't even notice that he had company.  
  
"Josh?" Zoey whispered as she crouched down next to him. Her cool hand met his warm face as she attempted to smooth his hair back. His eyes met her's and he registered recognition. He tried to smile at her worried face and then noticed her mother standing there.  
  
"Ma'am," he said, as he struggled to stand up.  
  
"Joshua," Abbey said. "You've had a rough night," she observed.  
  
"We all have," he corrected her.  
  
"How is Donna?" Zoey asked.  
  
"She," Josh looked back to the door where he could see Donna staring off into a corner. "She has a concussion. There was a little bit of blood loss from her fall," he continued. "She's little banged up...no permanent physical damage."  
  
"Well, thank God," Abbey sighed, relieved.  
  
"But...I don't know," he sighed, turning about to stare at her through the glass pane.  
  
"She just kind of shut off when I told her about Michael. She didn't want me in the room. And she cried," he started to cry thinking about her sobs. "She cried so loud and so hard. It damn near killed me," he whispered as he felt Zoey squeeze his shoulder. "Why couldn't I save him?"  
  
"Enough," Abbey told him. "Josh - you're not Superman," she lectured. "No one blames you for what happened. It was the asshole who thought it'd be a good night to shoot at the new President and his friends. Not you. Michael was proud to be here tonight with Donna. With us. Donna was proud that he came with her. She was feeling like her two worlds were finally coming together. You were a big part of that for her," Abbey smiled as she talked to him. "Michael respected you. If he were here, he'd tell you it's not your fault."  
  
"I just...it's so hard," he whispered. "I can't quite focus," he admitted. "I see tonight and I see Roslyn. I can't tell the difference sometimes," he murmured. "I don't know if I did all I could. I got Donna down. I got myself down. He was right there..." he trailed off.  
  
"What's with the purse?" Zoey asked suddenly, just noticing him fiddling with it.  
  
"It's...Michael was holding it," he said. "It's Donna's," he smiled. "It matched her dress," he recalled her modeling it all excited that she actually purchased the entire outfit and cut the tags off. "She tossed it to him just before it happened. She was fixing a strap on her shoes and she couldn't hold...she needed someone to hold it," he sighed. "I laughed at her and told her that I wasn't gonna help her 'cause she was silly enough to wear such ridiculously high shoes," he murmured. "You know...typical banter shit," he sighed. "And...Michael...he took the bag," he took a deep breath before continued. "He...when they brought him in...here...he was still gripping it," he got out. "I wanted to...I mean...it's her bag," he sighed. "She needs to have it back," he reasoned. "I wanted to give it to her...but she doesn't want to see me right now," he said shaking his head.  
  
"Josh," Zoey breathed, reaching around his shoulders and hugging him tightly. "She's just in shock," she told him.  
  
"Joshua," Abbey told him. He straightened up and turned to face her.  
  
"Yes ma'am," he said, sniffing.  
  
"She needs some time to get over this," Abbey said. "She just lost her fiancé. She's had a day," Abbey simplified the situation.  
  
"Mom," Zoey rolled her eyes. "It's not that simple."  
  
"No, dear. It is. Donna's gonna need to deal with this. She'll get through it. She has friends that love her. She'll be fine," Abbey said confidently. "She just needs time and our support. And Josh," she cautioned. "You need to give her time and you need to be there for her just like she was there for you."  
  
Josh looked at her with sad eyes. "I don't know if I can. I don't know how to do this. I just learned how the hell to function without her with me on a daily basis...I don't know how to do this."  
  
"You'll do it. You don't have a choice. This is your hand Josh. Play it. Get your ass in there and give that girl back her purse. Then you're going to go home and get a shower and a nap. I don't care if you go to the White House or your apartment...but you need to get some shut eye and cleaned up," she ordered. "Then you're going to go to work and then you're gonna help Donna."  
  
"Yes ma'am," he said.  
  
"I'll wait for you," Zoey smiled.  
  
"I'll go in to see her when you're done," Abbey told him.  
  
Zoey smiled and held her mother's hand as Josh took a deep breath and entered the room.  
  
"Donna?" he asked, quietly when she didn't acknowledge his entering.  
  
Her eyes moved from her corner and focused on him.  
  
"I...I just wanted to...to give you...to...give you your purse," he offered it to her.  
  
She looked at her tattered bag and then back at him, but she made no motion to take the bag from his hands.  
  
"Remember?" he tried again. "You were fixing your shoes and you couldn't hold onto it," he told her.  
  
"I gave it to Michael," she said in a monotone voice.  
  
"Yes," he encouraged.  
  
"Why do you have it?" she asked.  
  
"I...I mean...Michael gave it to me before he went into surgery," he answered her honestly.  
  
"You talked to him?" she asked.  
  
"Ah...yeah," he said, sort of distracted. He remembered talking to Michael. He remembered it vaguely, but everything was so jumbled in his brain at the moment.  
  
"What did he say?" Donna asked, suddenly focused.  
  
Josh's mind went blank. He knew they talked. He remembered that. But....what did they say? He kept hearing Toby asking him if he was okay? But that was from before...that was from Roslyn, wasn't it? He shook his head and covered his face with his hands and scrubbed his eyes.  
  
"Joshua?" she asked in a whisper.  
  
"Donna - I don't...I mean...I can't....I don't know what to say," he whispered.  
  
"Are you okay?" she asked, worried.  
  
Josh laughed bitterly at her question. "I should be asking you that," he said.  
  
"Josh...I know this is hard on you too," she reasoned.  
  
"Stop being that way," he ordered. "I'm fine."  
  
"Okay," Donna sighed, toying with her blanket corner. "It's just easier sometimes to worry about others, I guess."  
  
"Donna," he breathed. "Are you gonna be okay?" he asked as he noticed her eyes filling with tears.  
  
"No," she answered honestly. "I don't know how to do this," she breathed.  
  
"Neither do I," he told her.  
  
"Okay," she said.  
  
"I have to go," he told her.  
  
"Okay," she said.  
  
"You'll be okay?" he said.  
  
"No," she shook her head sadly.  
  
"Donna," he sighed.  
  
She tried to smile. She tried to get him to leave thinking that she'd be sad, but still relatively okay. She just couldn't. She cried instead. Then he held her in his arms and stroked her hair until she fell asleep. Then he left. He had to get out of there. He couldn't breathe.  
  
He left the room and looked at Zoey, who was still standing at the door with her mother waiting for him, just like she promised.  
  
"You gave her her purse?" Zoey asked.  
  
"I just left it by the bed. She was too upset I guess," he murmured.  
  
"Go," Abbey ordered. "Take a shower. Get a couple hours of sleep. Go and see your boss."  
  
"C'mon, Josh," Zoey begged, leading him down the hallway as he continued to glance back at Donna's door.  
  
Abbey watched her youngest daughter order the Chief of Staff of the United States down the hall. She smiled sadly and shook her head. He didn't look powerful at that moment. In fact, she thought, he looked like a lost little boy. She composed herself and nodded to her agent as she slipped inside Donna's room and held her hand while she slept.  
  
Josh took Zoey to the White House. She needed to see her father and he needed to see Leo...and his boss. Jed hugged Zoey tightly when they arrived in the Oval office and she clinged to him for dear life. Then she pulled back and noticed Charlie in the corner.  
  
"You should get some sleep," Charlie told her with a small grin.  
  
"Excellent idea," Jed agreed while Sam and Mal were hugging her.  
  
"Go to the Residence," the President told her. "We had rooms made up late last night."  
  
"Thanks Sam," she whispered, kissing his cheek. "I'll see you guys later," she told them. Before Charlie led her out of the Office, she hugged Josh tightly. "Come get me if she needs something...or if you do," she whispered and he nodded his response.  
  
"Josh," the President started. "You should really go take a shower or something. Then get some sleep," he told him.  
  
"Sir," he said standing up and clearing his throat. "What have I missed?"  
  
"We caught the guy that did this. It was a crazy fundamentalist organization's plot. He's being detained in maximum security. It's under control," the President explained.  
  
"I should have been here, Sir," Josh said, shaking his head. "It won't happen again."  
  
"Josh...stop with the 'Sir' shit right now," Sam pleaded.  
  
"I tried that with Leo," Jed smirked and Leo chuckled. "It's not gonna happen," they both said, trying to lighten the mood.  
  
Mallory cleared her throat and stood up. "How's Donna?" she asked. "We heard about Michael."  
  
"She's upset," Josh said, trying to sound detached. "She just lost her fiancé."  
  
"Did you see her?" Leo asked, coming to stand by the man who he had long considered his son.  
  
"Yeah," he voice cracked as he tried to hold back tears. "I had...I had her purse," he started to say and then he shook his head. "I saw her," he said instead. "She's tired and upset." He rubbed his eyes fiercely, trying to remain steady. "Your wife, Sir," he said, nodding to Jed, "is with Donna now. She wanted to sit with her I guess," Josh said. "CJ and Toby were checking on Danny's progress when I left, I think. He had a successful surgery, though," he reported. "If that's all," he said, looking from Leo, to Jed, to Mal and then to Sam.  
  
"Are you okay?" Sam asked him seriously.  
  
"I don't know," he answered honestly. "I need to clear my head...and then I need to get back to normal. I need to work," Josh said convincingly.  
  
"I have a room made up for you at the Residence," Sam told him.  
  
"No," Josh said, shaking his head. "I'll grab a shower in the locker room and then I'll get a short nap on the couch in my office. I have a change of clothes here, so it'll be fine. That way I'll be able to get working quicker," he explained. "Good night, Sirs," he said nodding to the men. "Ma'am," he said nodding to Mallory.  
  
He left and they all looked in shock. Josh was a wreck, and they all could see that. But Mallory sat down and huffed. "What is it?" Sam asked joining her on the couch.  
  
"I'm too young to be called 'ma'am'," she said. "Are people gonna call me that?" she asked looking at her husband and then to her father.  
  
Jed laughed a bit. "I'm going to join my wife at the hospital," he told them. "And, Ma'am," he said with a smirk to Mallory. "You'll get used to it," he assured her. "I didn't adjust to 'Sir' right away." 


	10. Chapter 10

Running the country never got easier, Sam realized as he stared out of his window onto Pennsylvania Avenue. It was raining today, he observed. Today was the day of Michael's funeral. He was being flown up to New Hampshire later to make his appearance and attempt to support Donna...and Josh, he assumed.  
  
His best friend had not been doing well. Josh was distant...often withdrawn. He was at work by 6 AM every morning and he was still there most days way after 10 PM. Donna had returned to New Hampshire almost as soon as she was released from the hospital with Michael's body to make the proper arrangements. When she left - he suspected another part of Josh died. Sam sighed and recalled when Donna had originally left - Josh was a mess and he didn't really get over it. Then, after years, Josh and Donna saw each other and Josh seemed better somehow. Sam figured that even though she seemed committed to Michael during that time, Josh was still a large part of her thoughts. And then - things seemed to have gotten worse before the holidays but then after Christmas, Josh and Donna were Josh and Donna again. And everyone was so happy at his Inauguration.  
  
Now Josh was reliving Roslyn nightly in his dreams - that much Sam was sure. With this latest shooting - Sam wasn't sure how Josh would manage. No, that's not right, he thought shaking his head. Really he was unsure on how Josh would manage without Donna. And if he was honest - he didn't know how Donna would survive this ordeal all alone in New Hampshire.  
  
Sam slumped in his desk and buzzed Josh's latest assistant, Candy, on the phone. "Is he in?" he asked.  
  
"No...he hasn't been here all morning, Sir," she told him.  
  
"Have you tried his cell? His pager? His apartment?" he asked, suddenly worried.  
  
"Yes," Candy said with a sigh. "It went to voice mail; he never called back; I left a message," she answered him in order.  
  
Sam slammed down the phone. "Shit!" he yelled and banged his desk.  
  
"Hey," Mallory exclaimed walking in. "What's wrong?"  
  
"I don't know where Josh is," he told her. "No one's seen him all morning and it's very late for him," he said glancing at his watch. It's almost noon."  
  
"Maybe he slept in?" Mal offered, trying to be helpful.  
  
"He helps me run the fucking country," Sam yelled. "He's not afforded that luxury."  
  
"Sam," Mallory said, putting her hand on his shoulder. "Stop," she commanded. "You're just worried; you're not mad at him."  
  
"I know," he sighed. "And I should be both," he told her.  
  
Kathy buzzed him. "Mr. President? Zoey's on the phone," she told him.  
  
He answered immediately. "Zoey? Is Donna all right?" he asked.  
  
"She's doing as well as can be expected. But it's not her I'm worried about," Zoey told him. She knelt down on the cushion by the picture window and sighed as she watched Josh pace past her parents' front porch for the hundredth time. "Josh is here."  
  
Sam put her on speaker phone so Mal could hear her. "Josh's there? Is he okay?"  
  
"I don't know," she told them. "He just paces in front of the door. He's been here for 4 hours now - just pacing and mumbling to himself."  
  
"He came early for the funeral," Mallory offered. Has he seen Donna?" Mal asked.  
  
"Nope. She's here. He hasn't knocked. He just walks and mumbles," Zoey sighed. "Has he been okay?"  
  
"We think the PTSD is affecting him more prevalently lately," Mal explained. "Toby's called Stanley and he'll be here next week on stand-by."  
  
"Good," Zoey smiled. "He needs to get help soon."  
  
"We'll be there soon," Mal told her.  
  
"What's he wearing?" Sam asked, suddenly.  
  
Zoey looked again. "Sneakers, jeans, and a Harvard sweatshirt," she said. "Shit! He must be freezing. I didn't really look at his clothes before now," she sighed sadly.  
  
"He left from here last night. He didn't even go home," Sam accused. "He was wearing that yesterday to work. I yelled at him for not looking more professional. Zoey - get him inside please. Try and get his act together for the funeral. Donna has enough to worry about. "We're leaving now," he told her. "We'll handle this when we land."  
  
"Okay guys," Zoey said. "I'll see you soon," she said and hung up. She grabbed a coat for herself and a blanket for Josh and headed out into the snow for him.  
  
Donna heard the door and she looked out her window in time to see Zoey and Josh arguing over the blanket and coming inside. She smiled and decided to go down and drag him in herself.  
  
The two of them stopped their bickering when Donna cleared her throat from the doorway.  
  
"Donna," Josh whispered.  
  
"Sorry we bothered you," Zoey told her. "This bonehead wants to get frostbite."  
  
Donna smiled a little. "Come in. I'll make you some coffee," she told him and turned and walked back inside without giving him a second look.  
  
Josh followed her in arguing how he didn't want any coffee and Zoey shook her head. "Whatever," she shrugged and followed Josh in.  
  
Zoey waited a few moments before going into the parlor, where Josh and Donna were. When she entered, Josh was on the couch, curled up and asleep. Donna was sipping hot chocolate with her legs tucked under her body.  
  
"Hey," Zoey whispered.  
  
"Hey," Donna replied. "Did you want some hot chocolate or some coffee or something?" she offered.  
  
"No," Zoey smiled. "What's going on?"  
  
"He needed to sleep," Donna said matter-of-factly. "He'll be fine once he wakes up."  
  
"He looked tired," Zoey mused.  
  
"He hasn't slept in days," Donna told her. "He mentioned it before he crashed."  
  
"Why is he sleeping now?" Zoey wondered.  
  
"Cause...he needs sleep," Donna reasoned. "I guess he just needed to feel safe and he does here."  
  
"Or he does with you," Zoey corrected.  
  
"Regardless," Donna dismissed her. "I have to get a shower. When he wakes up - send him up. He'll need to get ready if he's coming later."  
  
"Of course," Zoey told her. Zoey smiled as she watched Donna put down her cup and then wrap another blanket around Josh's still shivering body and smooth his hair back. Josh seemed to calm under her touch. Zoey shook her head in awe. "Donna?" she asked as Donna started up the stairs.  
  
"Hmmm?" she asked turning around to face her friend.  
  
Zoey smiled and sighed. "Nothing," she shrugged. "You're just an amazing person. You're taking care of a man who has been an ass to you more times than I care to count and you're the one who needs the care. How do you do it time and time again without getting more and more pissed off at him?" she wondered.  
  
"Him being here...that was his way of taking care of me, I guess. He just didn't know what to do," she smiled. "And I like feeling needed...so Josh needing me helps, I guess," she shrugged. "You have to get Josh, I suppose," she mused, with a smile.  
  
"And you get him? After all these years?" Zoey asked.  
  
"I always got Josh. Josh always got me. It's that simple. Time can't change some things, I guess," she shrugged. "Send him up when he wakes up," Donna told her and then she turned and continued running up the stairs.  
  
Zoey shook her head again and smiled at Josh. He looked like a little boy even though he was completely middle-aged. She grabbed a magazine and began reading. A short time later, Sam, Mallory, Gabriella, Leo, CJ, and Toby arrived at the Bartlet Farm and they let themselves in quietly. They eventually found Zoey sitting with a sleeping Josh in the parlor.  
  
"Hey," Sam whispered kissing her cheek. "He okay?"  
  
Zoey smiled at them all and waved. "He needed sleep, according to Donna," she informed them. "He wouldn't come in one minute and then the next thing I knew he was laying her fast asleep. Donna's an amazing woman."  
  
"That she is," CJ smiled. "Score one for the Sisterhood!"  
  
Mallory smiled. "Where is Donna?"  
  
"She's getting ready right now upstairs. Josh is to be sent there when he wakes up," Zoey told them.  
  
"I brought him a suit," Toby offered, holding up a garment bag.  
  
"Donna will be ecstatic," Zoey told him.  
  
"My parents and Leo are already at the funeral home, dealing with the mundane details so Donna doesn't have to," Zoey explained. "We've set up guest rooms on the east end of the house for you all so you can get ready there and sleep over if you need to or whatever."  
  
Josh stirred a bit and his eyes fluttered open. "When did you all get here?" he asked groggily.  
  
"A little bit ago," Sam explained.  
  
Josh drug himself up to a standing position. "I beg your pardon, Sir," he said to his friend.  
  
"Josh," Sam sighed. "Are you okay?" he asked, clearly worried.  
  
"No," he answered with tears in his eyes.  
  
"Is he awake?" Donna's voice traveled down the stairs.  
  
"He's on his way," Zoey shouted back up. She then turned to Josh. "Be okay for five minutes and get your ass up there and see Donna," she ordered. "Toby brought you a suit."  
  
"I'll be okay," Josh promised Sam with a bit of a sad smile. "I promise that I'll be okay, Sir," he said as she grabbed the garment bag and walked up the stairs to Donna.  
  
"That's unhealthy," Toby commented as they all stared after Josh.  
  
"I'm changing the baby," Mallory announced.  
  
"I'll show you to your rooms," Zoey told the group and led through the massive farm house.  
  
"Hey," Donna said to Josh as he approached her room.  
  
"Donna," he smiled at her. "Toby brought me a suit," he said dangling it in his hand.  
  
"Good," Donna smiled. "I was worried we'd have to make the sweatshirt work. Go," she said. "Get it on so I can fix you."  
  
"You've been gone a while," Josh told her. "I can dress myself now," he informed her.  
  
Donna laughed. "I've seen you at things. My help is definitely needed."  
  
"Whatever you say," he smirked and disappeared into an open room across the hall. He reappeared a little while later and said, "Well?"  
  
"Come here," she ordered and he smiled as she went right for his tie.  
  
"I can totally make the clip-ons work," he told her.  
  
"Uh huh," she agreed as she tied his tie and straightened it. She looked at him for a long while - just looked. He looked so scared and so small. He was dying inside and she knew it. She remembered how it ate away at him - day by day. She could help him, she thought. It was too late to save Michael, but Josh could be okay. He just needed help. Helping her, she assumed, was a way for him to help himself and she was only too happy to oblige. "Thank you for coming Josh," she told him honestly and wrapped her arms around his body.  
  
His arms encircled her as well and he placed a kiss in her hair, "No, Donnatella," he whispered. "Thank you."  
  
She hugged him tighter and her body began to tremble and she cried - really cried. It was the first time she cried since at the hospital, she recalled. Josh just held her and stroked her hair and she continued to cry. Josh's eyes filled up as well, but he refused to give in. He needed to be strong for Donna.  
  
He moved them to the bed and he set her down and pushed her hair back from her damp cheeks and pressed a kiss on her forehead. "Whatever I can do for you Donna," he whispered as he looked her directly in the eyes.  
  
"I'm just so sad...and mad," she confessed. "Why did this happen to him? We had this whole little life planned. We were gonna get married and have children and get a house," she sniffed.  
  
"It's not fair," Josh said.  
  
"No," Donna said. "It's not fair. I don't deserve this."  
  
"No, you don't," he whispered. "You deserve all the happiness in the world," he told her.  
  
"Why can't I have it?" she asked in a small voice as Josh guided her head down to a pillow on the bed. She curled up on her side to face him.  
  
"Maybe it's still out there," he mused, running his fingers through her blond locks. "Maybe your happily-ever-after is just around the next corner," he mused, trying to sound hopeful.  
  
Tears continued to fall down her face and her eyes looked up at him with so much emotion he almost burst into hysterical tears. "No," she whispered. "My happily ever after is being buried in two hours. I'm not getting the fairytale, Josh," she whimpered as her eyes fell closed, but the tears still came.  
  
Josh didn't know what to say. He got up from the bed and moved to a chair near it. He held her hand and smiled sadly at her. She was so upset, he thought. But she never looked more perfect to him. He shook his head, realizing how sick he was to think anything of the sort. But she did look beautiful. Sure, he mused, her make up was a mess. He laughed a bit because she did look like a bit of a raccoon. But her hair was splayed flowingly across the pillow which was cased in a cranberry-colored fabric. The dark color contrasted perfectly with her fair skin and hair. Her lips were coated with a rosy shade of glass that picked up the pinkish hue in her cheeks. She wore a simple black dress - long sleeves, belted with a slight flare at her hips. The skirt bunched up around her knees from her current position. She wore black hose and simple black pumps. On her dress lay a black hat with a little black netting on it. He smiled picturing her with it on - very Jackie O, he thought. She was gonna be the death of him, he swore to himself. And God help him, he was going to love every moment of it. In that moment, he knew that she had to come back to Washington with him. She needed to help people to keep her mind of things - she just as well said that earlier and countless times before. And who the hell needed more help than him? He'd be seeing Stanley, no doubt, more frequently once he got home, he figured. He'd need someone to talk to - someone he trusted with his life and his deepest secrets - he needed Donna. And damnit, he hoped that a little part of her needed him too. After the day, he mused, he'd talk to her. He'd make her see that she had to come back to work with him...as friends. He needed his friend Donna back and he suspected that she could use a friend, too.  
  
CJ and Toby approached the door to Donna's room slowly, unsure as to what they would find when they actually entered. "We've got to get her to the service," CJ murmured to Toby as they knocked lightly on the partially closed door.  
  
Toby sighed and pushed it open. Donna lay curled up on the bed and Josh stared at her intently from a chair. "Josh?" Toby whispered. "Didn't you hear us knocking?"  
  
Josh was torn from his vigil and looked at Toby and CJ. "Does she need to get up?" he asked, ignoring the question.  
  
"We should get going, yes," CJ confirmed, glancing briefly at Toby as Josh sat on the bed and brushed back Donna's hair and whispered softly to her to wake her up.  
  
"We'll be in the hall," Toby said, clearing his throat and dragging CJ out with him.  
  
"What is wrong with you?" CJ asked, jerking her arm free.  
  
"Let's just give them a minute," Toby suggested.  
  
"But Josh...he's getting too reattached," CJ warned.  
  
"He's not getting anything," Toby informed her. "He's never been unattached from Donna. And, as much as I'd like to say otherwise, he needs her to get through this. They have a bond that none of us have been able to replicate and I don't venture that we try now. He needs her. She needs him. They'll hold each other up if need be," he told her.  
  
"And what if she can't save him from himself?" CJ asked. "I mean...she has enough on her plate right now. How unfair of us to throw Josh to her for saving!"  
  
Toby smiled. "She wants to fix Josh. He, apparently, has a fixable quality to him," he explained. "Andie told me," he smirked. "Women eat it up. And for whatever reason, Donna gets him in a way that none of us ever has...not even Leo," he smiled. "They'll fix whatever is wrong...together."  
  
"Wow," CJ smiled. "That was a whole lot of nice you just spewed," she smirked.  
  
"Uh huh. Don't spread that around," he smiled slightly. "Get a move on you two," he called into the room. "We'll meet you out front." Toby followed CJ down the stairs and nodded to the others. "They'll be right out. Give them a second," he instructed.  
  
Donna had gone into the bathroom to fix her face once Josh had woken her up. She came out with her hair pulled back and all signs of tears gone. She smiled sadly at Josh, "How do I look?"  
  
"Perfect," he told her, with a sincere, sad smile. "Too perfect to have to go through all of this."  
  
"Thanks," she answered and straightened his tie and smoothed his suit. "Ready?"  
  
"If you are," he answered, offering her his hand.  
  
She threw her body into his and her hands reached across his body and grabbed his left hand. So, his right arm encased her shoulders and hugged her close. "Come on," he whispered.  
  
"Ride with me?" she asked hoarsely.  
  
"Where else was I gonna ride?" he asked. "I flew in last night and took a cab here. I have few options for transportation," he tried to joke, earning a jab in the ribs as he escorted her down the stairs, to the limo, to Michael's funeral.  
  
The funeral was short. Donna couldn't handle much more than that. Everyone cried. Donna could barely make it through the eulogy. Josh sat still most of the time. He tried to focus on the mounds of work that would undoubtedly be on his desk when he got back to the office. He tried to remind himself that he should call his mother. He tried to think of anything other than about death. Death brought him back to the shooting and that was jumbled in his head with Roslyn. That scared him. He needed help. And that was yet another thing that he didn't want to think about.  
  
After the burial, everyone was invited back the Bartlets' for dinner. The house was buzzing with remembrances and the usual political buzz that had occupied this place for decades. Donna smiled to those wishing her well. Maxine, her boss, told her to take off as much time as she needed. Her professors, who were friends with Michael, offered her extensions on all of her papers and tests. Michael's family smiled at her and told her that she could still visit with them on the holidays. It was surreal. She couldn't breathe - so she left.  
  
She ran from the farm house back to the stables. There was a fresh coat of snow on the ground and the wind was biting cold. She figured the stables would block a little of the wind chill. She sat on a rickety old stool and pet her favorite horse - Trey. She felt tears drip down her cheeks again when she recalled the time she and Michael went riding last summer. Trey nuzzled her a bit when her petting slowed and she quickly resumed, frantically wiping away her tears. "Sorry, buddy," she whispered. "My life is just a big freaking mess. I don't know what I'm gonna do now...I guess that would be again," she sighed. "I thought I was finally on the right track, ya know? And then...wham! I'm back at square one. I don't know what I'm gonna do," she cried.  
  
"Come home, Donnatella," Josh whispered from just outside the stall.  
  
She turned and wiped her face again and stared at him. "What?" she whispered.  
  
"Well, first, put this on," he insisted, wrapping her in his coat. "Then come home," he said - as if it was as simple as pie.  
  
"Josh," she focused on him more clearly. "I am home."  
  
"No you're not," he said plainly. "What do you have here?"  
  
"Friends," she stated.  
  
"I'll make Zoey move to Washington," he informed her. "I'm powerful - I can do that."  
  
"A job," she listed.  
  
"I'll give you a better one - one with shitty hours and low wages and tons of satisfaction," he countered.  
  
"School," she tried again.  
  
"I'll enroll you in online classes or something and then you'll finish and you can educate yourself while working," he smiled.  
  
"I don't have anything in Washington anymore, Josh," she tried to explain. "I've grown up," she smiled. "It's not like before. I don't need you to make me me," she tried to explain.  
  
"But I need you to make me me," he said. "I don't think I can do this by myself."  
  
"I don't know if I can either," she confessed. "I was willing to try."  
  
"I'm not," he said plainly. "I'm going home - now," he told her.  
  
"But everyone else is staying tonight, I thought," she replied, confused.  
  
"Yeah...well, I'm going - now," he said again.  
  
"My flight leaves in an hour and a half. My cab's waiting," he smiled, confidently at her. "Come home, Donnatella," he whispered before turning and leaving.  
  
Donna slowly walked up to the front of the house and saw the taillights of Josh's cab going out to the main road. He left his coat, she mused, hugging it closer around her.  
  
Two Secret Service agents came out of the front door, signaling the President's imminent arrival. Donna smiled when he appeared next to her. "Josh left," she whispered.  
  
"I heard," Sam smirked. "He just called."  
  
"He wants me to go back to work for him," Donna said, staring out at the property.  
  
"He mentioned that," Sam smirked. "Funny - being President and all - I thought that I'd do the hiring and stuff."  
  
She laughed a little. "I don't know what to do," she confessed. "I don't know if I can do this."  
  
"Do what?" Sam asked.  
  
"Live," she answered honestly. "It just doesn't seem fair. Why should I get to keep going when Michael's life was cut so short?"  
  
"It's just the way it is, sometimes," Sam explained. "Maybe you just need a little help. God knows Josh does."  
  
"Did you call Stanley for him? He needs to talk to him," Donna told him.  
  
"Toby did it," Sam smiled. "I don't know if Josh's gonna make it alone this time," Sam mused.  
  
"He'll be fine," Donna smiled. "He just needs support is all."  
  
"Donna - we don't know how to help him anymore," Sam told her.  
  
"He's too dependent on me," Donna protested as she felt a vibration in the pocket of Josh's jacket.  
  
She pulled out the blackberry and read the attached message --- When you come home - bring my coat. It's freezing!  
  
She shook her head. "This man is hopeless," she sighed, putting it back in the pocket and finding a plane ticket with a post-it note reading "HOME."  
  
"So, Mr. President," she sighed. "Can I have a job?"  
  
Sam smirked and shook his head to fight back an actual laugh.  
  
"Can I hitch a ride?" she asked quietly, fighting back tears.  
  
"Go on," he nodded to a limo by the side of the house.  
  
"I'll see you in Washington, Mr. President," she smiled through her tears and leaned up to kiss him on the cheek. She jogged to the awaiting car, clutching the jacket to her body. She leaned up to the driver, "I need to go to the airport." She smiled slightly and handed him her ticket so that he knew what gate to go to.  
  
She laid back in the car and closed her eyes. This was right, she thought. She'd go home, as Josh so simply put it. She used to New Hampshire to forget Josh....so why couldn't she use Washington to forget Michael? No, she thought...she couldn't forget Michael. Hell...forgetting Josh hadn't been a simple task, she laughed bitterly. But she moved on. And she'd do it again...with help, she thought.  
  
She moved into the terminal slowly just as they announced last call. She saw Josh tooling around the door to the plane delaying his entrance as long as possible. She smiled. She missed their banter. She missed his bellowing. She missed his sweetness. She missed his sincerity. She actually missed working twenty-hour days. "You forgot your coat," she smiled making her way to his side and tossing her boarding pass to the ticket-taker.  
  
"Donna," he smiled at her. "You came."  
  
"You needed your coat," she smirked. "I couldn't fathom hearing you bitch cause you had the flu or something because of the lack of coat situation."  
  
"Yeah?" he asked, smiling more fully.  
  
"I wanna go home," she smiled at him.  
  
"I'm so glad," he told her honestly.  
  
"I...I just don't know what else to do, really," Donna told him. "I just don't know anymore..." she trailed off. "But I know I can't do it alone and I hate worrying about you - which is what I'll end up doing, ya know. Wondering if you've talked to Stanley...if you're having the nitemares..."  
  
"Thank you for caring," Josh told her, guiding her to their seats.  
  
"Um...where am I going?" she asked, sitting down. "I mean..I don't have a home there anymore," she recalled.  
  
"I rented you an apartment. Nicer neighborhood than you had before....but I think you'll adjust," he smirked. "You need to be at your desk tomorrow morning at 6 AM," he told her. "I have a lot of work to catch up on."  
  
"We're gonna be okay," she whispered laying her head on his shoulder. "I promise."  
  
"I believe you," he whispered back. 


End file.
